Greetings Parents!
Getting my sons to write an assignment is far more difficult than bathing all three of our dogs. Amazing what happens, though, when there is incentive. As I home school one, there are many "engagements of will" that occur over what is needed vs. excessive. He recently, however, found an item that he "really really" wants to purchase went off and I suggested he wrote a persuasive essay on why we should agree to this purchase. "Sure Mom, there are so many good reasons for this! I'll look them up!" "That's great," I answer, "but when the list is finished, you need to craft an essay." "No problem, I got this!" he says. I suggested we review the format for such an essay, but he assured me he knows. "Great," I answered, "so before I see it, lookup the format online and match it." I said it with a smile.
He's working on the essay as we speak. Motivation is a major ingredient of every accomplishment, and of most actions. We're all motivated by something - usually seeking a means to be happy - but as parents, we are often moved by a great sense of duty and responsibility. Smelling that poo-ey diaper and getting up close to it does not make me happy, but knowing I cared for my child and made him happier - that brings great satisfaction. Struggling through homework or making long drives every week to a sports activity in the wee hours of the morning - these actions don't make me spring joyfully from bed after a late night of cleaning or work. However, thinking of the smile on my son's face as he greets his friends, while they're playing the game or running a race, and commiserating afterwards - those make me happy and satisfied that I have met my motherly duty.
So motivation helps us push through the less ideal to attain a goal. Pondering this, how might it affect my faith life? When I leave Mass, there is always a great sense of peace that come from being in God's Presence (a peace I did not always feel), but also a "happiness" that I did what God asked -fulfilled a duty. For a long time, that is what I looked to when going to Mass, focusing on "what I got out of it," which sometimes seemed like just a relief of guilt. Eventually I was encouraged to take time to recall everything that happened during the Mass, from seeing familiar faces and having quiet time in this overly-busy world to giving God a chance to help me become aware of His Presence. This helped in absorbing the God's Words in the first half of the Mass and recognizing a message relevant to my life at the moment. Gradually, attending Mass to alleviate guilt was far lower on the motivation scale than was the happiness derived like after a great visit with a really good friend. Not a partying visit, but one in which we shared what was weighing on our hearts as well as the joys we just had to share because they were too great to keep to ourselves. And then I realized, it had become an Encounter.
Only Just as my boys do not share my love of reading and writing - at least not yet - they have not quite embraced the experience of Encounter. Their motivated more by duty, and knowing consequences occur for bailing, but recently I think some of it is because they know how sad I am when they miss this experience of grace. At times, though, they do seem to have an "aha" moment they'll share that sprinkles a little more motivation to stick with this "faith thing," at least for now. And that gives me more reason to continue pushing, praying, and trying to make the right choices.
Hug your children tight, say prayers together, especially at night, and recall with them after Mass (in Church or online) what thoughts you and they had that might have been a moment with God.
-- Linda Bader, Coordinator of Religious Education
P.S. Did you know... Jesus and Mary appeared to St. Catherine of Siena, became a nun, reproved the pope for fleeing the papacy in Rome and told him to return, which he eventually did. Both humble and fearless, God was her strength and her love for Him pushed her to speak and act despite her fears. Her spiritual writings led her to be declared one of the 35 Doctors of the Catholic Church.