KRISTINA'S WEEKLY EMAIL OF THOUGHT-PROVOKING ESSAYS & VIDEOS TO KEEP YOU CONNECTED TO YOURSELF ON THIS JOURNEY CALLED LIFE
A NOTE FROM KRISTINA:
Greetings!

Relationships are the area of life we humans seem to have the most difficulty with. They come in all shapes and forms, but the ones closest to us - our partners, friends and family - usually present the most challenges, and thus the most opportunities for healing, growth and joy.

When relationships are not healthy with those connected to us either by blood, legal or social contract or long history, it can have repercussions in every other relationship and area of life. And then of course that is reflected in the human family, which if you haven't noticed, has been having a lot of trouble getting along for a while now...

The outer world is a manifestation of our inner world, so once again it all comes back to our relationship to ourselves, and taking responsibility in how we show up with and respond to others. I am by no means, and am in fact very far from, an expert in this area, as it too, has been one of the hardest for me to navigate throughout my life. This past year has put a tremendous strain on our interactions with others in a variety of ways, and it seems like we are being faced with the biggest, deepest core issues we have around them.

But trust that the "stuff" coming up for confronting and/or purging now is the fodder and fertilizer we need to make us, and thus all our relationships, better. I am not saying this is easy or fun!

And remember that for transformation to occur, there is always a metaphoric (and sometimes literal) death involved that has to happen in order to make way for the new, improved version - or a healthy goodbye. But we have been the dysfunctional blind leading the blind, and unconscious and subconscious ingrained habits and patterns die hard... This is never a pretty, and is often a quite painful, process so please be patient and compassionate with yourself and others as you go through it. And be sure to have plenty of Kleenex on hand....

This week's PGG touches on these themes, and the PGG Video of the Week reminds you about the importance of listening, one of the most important aspects of relationships. Today's Instagram post reminds you about the importance of receiving, something that many of us have a hard time doing, which blocks true intimacy; and here is a bonus post since it was Earth Day yesterday about using nature to heal (i.e. have a relationship with trees!)

Lastly, if you look forward to and benefit from these weekly missives and PGG essays and want to show your gratitude, any donations for my efforts are welcome and appreciated here: Paypal.me/kristinaleonardi. And as always, please feel free to contact me with any comments about anything.

Big hug <3
Kristina

P.S. Want to get unstuck and on track in your career and life in 2021 and beyond? Check out the website for my individual coaching services.
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"I love your PGG newsletters - one of the only ones I actually read in its entirety. They are excellently written, and spot on. Thanks for being so inspirational and reflective!" ~ Tom D.
People Who Need People
Originally published October 12, 2012

Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival. ~ C.S. Lewis

Despite what Simon & Garfunkel once sang, we are neither rocks, nor islands, as many of us (especially those drawn to live in the metropolis that is New York!) might want to be. The irony of course is that the very nature of being human means we are part of a greater whole and must interact with other human beings on many levels. Yet a sense of connection and belonging doesn’t always come from the family, tribe or culture we are born into so we must create that connection authentically, first within ourselves and then with others.

Relationships are one of the most difficult areas for us homo sapiens to navigate, and they are the biggest source of our pleasure as well as our pain. The past several years we have had an advanced course in them; I for one can say as difficult as it’s been, have learned some new and deeper versions of lessons I know will serve me well in the future, all of which culminated in a super-summer intensive, with this harvest season reaping the wisdom culled from that journey.

Some of those nuggets include: finding the balance between losing ourselves/being co-dependent versus isolating and becoming a monk (or a psychopath); having boundaries and not taking on/feeling responsible for another's emotional or other type of well-being; nurturing yourself, no one can know exactly what you need but you; seeing people and relationships as they really are, not how you’d like them to be. And regarding those close/intimate relationships that are more difficult or challenging, keep in mind that that person — whether parent, boss, spouse, sibling, lover, friend, child — is just the actor playing a role in a scenario you have created in order to heal and grow.

Lastly, the people you choose to allow into your life — friends/boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/partner- should meet certain criteria. The word ‘friend’ especially has been so diluted and watered down with the use of Facebook and social media you need to be able to separate the wheat from the chaff and discern the Apples and Oranges.

The foundation of a relationship with anyone deserving of your time and energy must include understanding, appreciation and respect. You should be able to check off at least two of these to be considered a friend, and if you are fortunate to have someone in your life who truly understands, appreciates and respects you, then you are very, very lucky and should treasure and honor that relationship for the special gem that it is.

The bottom line is, You Gotta Have Friends, and making time for friendships and your most important relationships is not a luxury but a necessity. It’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day busyness of life, but we need to discipline ourselves to create space for connecting with the people who love and accept us, who know and understand us, with whom we share interests and history, and have grown together, not apart.

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If you like what I write, you'll love what I have to say in person!


If you look forward to and benefit from these weekly essays and want to show your gratitude, any donations for my efforts are welcomed and appreciated here: Paypal.me/kristinaleonardi

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Remember, you can always see PGGs from any month or year going back to 2010 on my website at www.kristinaleonardi.com and visit my social media pages for more inspiration throughout the week! Want to share my PGG? Use my Medium page for friendliest posting version.

If you're looking for some compassionate candor and a dose of tough love, Kristina is the coach for you.... I came into this really lacking clarity and walked away with a sense of relief. Can't recommend her enough. ~ Kevin R.

Now is a great time to take stock of and get on track with your career and life with clarity, balance and direction.


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Heart & Soul: The Key to Success in 2021 and Beyond

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SELF-CARE IN THE MIDST OF SEA CHANGE:
Navigating times of transition for healing and personal growth

Using the Great Pause for Personal & Professional Development

Staying Motivated Throughout the Job Search Process

Authentic Branding: Letting the Real You Shine in Any Situation

Who Are You & What Are You Supposed to Be Doing with Your Life?

Stepping Stones for Success

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