November 2023

In this issue, articles from:

Becky Callaway, Lower School Principal

Daniel Kempf, Middle School Principal

Dan Knudsen, High School Principal

Screen-time for Young Children:

How Soon is too Soon; How much is too Much?

Navigating the Jungle of Technology with Kids

Becky Callaway, Lower School Principal

This past summer, as my husband and I were vacationing with our youngest daughter, her husband, and their two small children, their six-month-old began to get fussy in our restaurant one evening while we were awaiting the arrival of our meal. Though they follow a very restrictive policy on television viewing, iPad interactions, and phone “watching” with both their boys, our daughter pulled a video meant for infants and toddlers up, propped the cell phone up on the table where the baby could see it, and pressed “play.” What I witnessed next was shocking. Immediately, Wilson stopped fretting and squirming. His eyes became glued to the phone screen, and though he may have blinked once or twice over the next 10 or 15 minutes, I missed seeing it. To say that the program playing over the YouTube app was spelling-binding to this six-month-old baby is not at all an exaggeration.

If an infant can become transfixed in a moment by something as innocent as “Baby Einstein,” or “Thomas the Train,” what, I pondered, is taking place mentally and emotionally in the minds of older children for whom electronic devices are used as babysitters or pacifiers, more frequently and for longer stretches of time?

These same questions have been circulating through the tech community for several years. Recognizing the validity of such concerns, before 2020, a substantial portion of the Silicon Valley parents who were employed by big tech giants such as Microsoft, Intel, Apple, and others implemented extremely strict protocols with their own children regarding technology exposure. One family, interviewed by Jamie Yuccas of CBS News, revealed that their home was technology-free of devices used for entertainment. Their children did not play video games or even watch TV, and they were not scheduled to receive cell phones… (wait for it) …until they were teenagers. The couple, Pierre and Monica Laurent, along with their children, stated that the only thing they really missed about technology is the convenience of listening to music or an audio book. The Laurent children’s school, the Silicon Valley Waldorf School, stresses physical activity and art over technology. In fact, computers are not assigned to the students at Waldorf until eighth grade. This is in a school district where 75% of the parents are employed by the tech industry. (www.cbsnews.com/news/silicon-valley-parents-are-raising-their-kids-tech-free)

What do the parents of children growing up in the shadow of technology’s “Mecca” know from which the average parent in Anytown, USA could benefit? According to Laurent, “the tech industry designs products to hook users” without parents suspecting it because warnings are not issued for otherwise benign products or sights. According to Caroline Knoor, senior parenting editor for Common Sense Media, many computer programs are designed to capture and change user behavior (hence the term “hook”) at younger and younger ages. Additionally, children are easily drawn into the proverbial technology maze through the incessant use of ads that interrupt the content's flow. One can resist clicking on commercials between segments of a show or a game for only so long, right? The bombardment of clever marketing along with the constant dopamine hits that come from “scoring” on the game are very effective “one-two-punches” that hook the user quickly and strongly. 

Pursuing excellence as the leader – showing students that leaders also have setbacks. 



Daniel Kempf, Middle School Principal

Today’s environment and culture is one where moments are captured permanently through social media posts or screenshot messages. At times, these moments could be held against you for the remainder of your career. We observe in athletics, politics, and pop culture that decisions made from one’s past can be brought back years later. This reality, in addition to the reality that Gen Z is more evaluative and skeptical of leadership, creates a paradigm for leaders today. 

Tim Elmore recently wrote an article presenting three perceptions Gen Z has toward their leaders. These perceptions were that Gen Z believes that leaders cannot be trusted, that leaders are hiding something, and that leaders mismanage people and finances. This research, in addition to my observations and conversations among leaders and students, brings me to the conclusion that this generation views leadership differently than previous ones. Because of this reality and a desire to present a biblical and authentic example to those I am leading, I have evaluated and adjusted my leadership philosophy to effectively lead in this generation. 

How do we lead people, adults, and students in a way that models both a pursuit of excellence and humility and authenticity in setbacks? This question started a journey for me of studying and interviewing many leaders over the past two years. This journey culminated in a belief that the following truths will guide my philosophy as both a school leader and as a parent of two children that I desire to know, love, and follow Jesus. 

Jesus INVITES all his followers into a life that is different from the world. 

2 Timothy 1:9 tells us that, “he has saved us and called us with a Holy calling –not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace”. God knows what is best for us, and as a loving protective father, he tells us through his Word the method of living that is best for us and his family. Christians should hold themselves to a high standard for the purpose of willingly pleasing a loving father, and as a picture to an unbelieving world what a life lived for Jesus looks like. This reality is the expectation for positional leaders and all followers of Christ. 

Leaders have failed, repented, and been restored by Jesus. 

Remember the life of Peter. He denied Jesus three times when he promised he would be faithful to the end. Jesus responds in John 21:15-17 and says, “feed my sheep”. Jesus asked Peter if he loved him, which Peter responded, “you know I love you”, and Jesus affirmed him and commissioned him to continue in his work. Jesus restored Peter AFTER his failure. What would have happened if Peter failed and quit? What would have happened if Jesus told Peter he was unqualified to lead? Thankfully, neither of those things happened and Peter was used to build the church and write letters in the New Testament. Are there mistakes that we as leaders need to repent of and pursue restoration with those we are leading? 

Leaders must live in honesty, humility, and repentance if they want to model the gospel to those they are leading. 

 Paul talks honestly about himself in Romans 7 where he says, “I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing…oh wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?”. Paul admitted his struggles and acknowledged that only through the power of Jesus can we live out this Christian walk. Influential leaders understand their humanity and display humility and repentance to those around them. This creates a culture of growth and honesty where everyone on your team understands failure and growth are a part of learning.  

Because authenticity is important to Gen Z, leaders may be more influential when those they are leading see that those in positions of leadership can have setbacks, are willing to admit them, and pursue growth. 

Whether you are a parent, a coach, a mentor, or a leader in an organization; I challenge you to consider leading in this way. I want those I am leading to desire excellence in all that they do and understand that failure is a fantastic teacher. If we desire individual responsibility and growth for those we are leading, we should model this philosophy as leaders ourselves.  

Combating Distraction, Dissatisfaction, and Drama with a Heavenly Perspective

Dan Knudsen, High School Principal

In the preface of the 40th anniversary of his classic, Celebration of Discipline, Richard Foster describes how technology, specifically social media, has profoundly changed the world since the first edition of his book was published in 1978. Apps and platforms such as Instagram, X, Snapchat, etc. have had a dramatic effect on our society and culture. To be fair, these can be fun, helpful, and even used to improve communication and friendships. Sadly, however, they often end up causing unexpected and unwanted problems for many high school students that we’ll identify as distraction, dissatisfaction, and drama.  

The first problem they cause is distraction. The New York Times reported in 2021 that the average screen time for students between 13-18 was eight hours and 39 minutes per day! Some of that is connected to their education, but the reality is that they are spending over half their waking hours in front of a screen!  

Secondly, while spending all this time on screens, students are bombarded with pictures and settings of others supposed “real lives” which are often over-the-top, and not an accurate representation of their actual lives. But this is often overlooked, and many students become more and more dissatisfied with their own looks, possessions, lives, etc.   

And lastly, people are much more prone to say things on a screen that they wouldn’t say to another person’s face. All this back-and-forth leads to much drama that may well have been avoided if people would just talk with one another.   

So, where does that leave us? While we don’t want to do away with technology, we do want to address the pitfalls that technology can cause for high school students.     

• Distractions keep people from things such as face-to-face conversations, enjoying the outdoors, reading good books, and even just doing something for another person who cannot repay you. Students lose hours each day scrolling through things that they have forgotten ten minutes later! Colossians 4:5b reminds us about “making the best use of the time.” Setting a screen “time limit” and even having an accountability partner if students cannot do this alone is a good way to start.  

• Much drama and many misunderstandings can be avoided by people talking with one another in person, rather than “hiding behind a screen”. Being able to hear the inflection in someone’s voice, see their body language, and look into their eyes greatly increases the chances for positive communication. James 1:19 tells us to “be quick to hear and slow to speak”, both of which are best done in face-to-face conversation.  

• Spending time in scripture and hearing the voice of God and what He thinks of us is the best way to combat dissatisfaction. The old hymn, Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus reminds us that as we look into the face of Jesus “the things of earth will grow strangely dim”. What a great way to combat dissatisfaction, getting a heavenly perspective of all that we have in Jesus! 

May we all be people who use our time well, listen before we speak to avoid drama, and always keep our eyes on Jesus!