April 2014


Volume 3, Issue #4
In This Issue
How Business Leaders Screw Themselves Over Every Day
About Lynne Franklin Wordsmith

 
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How We Get Information
from Others





 
 





Choice Words

"hai"
[hye]
 
 This single word in Japanese means, "Yes, I am listening to you, and I understand what you're saying."
 
Being aware of body language allows us to understand how someone thinks. Then we can use this to build rapport  and become more persuasive.








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In the Next Issue ...

 

Discover One of the Biggest Communication Opportunities You're Missing.

 

Before I understood the power of body language, I made a lot of gaffes.

 

The most spectacular came when sitting across from a controller. The man never looked me in the eyes -- he always looked down. Frankly, I thought he was looking at my chest! One day, I leaned down -- to put my face in his line of vision. "Excuse me," I said. "I'm up here" and sat up straight.

 

Don't screw up opportunities because you can't see what's going on. Use body language to connect with people's minds.

 
--Lynne 
Read Their Bodies; Connect with Their Minds

The pie chart to the left frightens me every time. Only 7% of the information people who meet you receive comes from your words. 38% comes from your voice tone and quality. 55% is your body language. That's because we know people can be coached on what and how to speak, but can be unaware of their body language. And when the body and the words don't match, we believe the body every time.

 

Here's how to read people's body language and understand how they think. When I say, "how they think," I mean it literally.

 

"Lookers"

These people process information in pictures and images. You can tell by reading their body language. Lookers generally dress well and decorate their surroundings for appearance. Their shoulders are usually a little raised and tight. They also have thin lips. In addition, Lookers have a furrowed brow -- because people tend to look up and to the right when they remember something they have seen.

 

To build rapport with Lookers, give them plenty of eye contact. They believe if you aren't looking at them, you aren't seeing them. They often use words with a visual component, so you should, too: "I see what you mean." "Picture this." "Here's what I envision."

 

"Listeners"

These people think in words and sounds. They don't give you much eye contact. Instead, they generally have their heads turned down and to the left -- because that's the posture people have when they remember something they have heard. This naturally points their right ear at you, so they can hear you. In addition, listeners can move their lips when they read, or speak quietly to themselves -- because it helps to speak their thoughts.

 

To connect with Listeners, don't give them too much eye contact -- it makes them uncomfortable (just ask that controller!). Look at them, and then look away -- when speaking or listening. Here, too, use words that appeal to them: "Tell me your opinion." "I hear what you're saying." "That sounds good to me."

 

"Touchers"

These people process information tactilely and through feelings. They dress for comfort, not style, and have a much more relaxed stance than Lookers. They also frequently look down and to the right -- because that's the posture people have when remembering something they have felt. As Touchers, these people enjoy physical contact, are big on hugs, and need very little personal space in a conversation.

 

For rapport, feel free to reach out and touch a Toucher's shoulder or arm when emphasizing a point -- but only if you feel comfortable doing this. If you're not a Toucher, do your best to avoid stiffening up if they touch you. And use language that appeals to them: "I feel your pain." "Let's get in touch." "I want to get a handle on the situation."

 

Be More Aware

Of course your brain is flexible, so you can think in more than one way. But you will have a dominant approach. Ask yourself, "How do I think?" I'm a Listener, so I remember movie lines and lyrics and grammar rules. I also can summon images of places I've been, but that's not my primary mode of thought.

 

Start watching people -- and paying attention to the words they use when speaking or writing. You'll begin to figure out how they think. And this will help you make better choices on how to connect with them.  
About Wordsmith
 
Our mission is to create meaningful corporate and marketing communications experiences
so clients solve their problems and get what they want. 
That often comes in one of these forms: 

1) Group Workshops, Keynote Addresses and Speeches on fun and practical ways to improve business communication
2) Leadership Communication Training on message development and presentation for executives 
3) Executive Ghostwriting for people who need more hours in their week
4) An Outsourced Corporate Communications Department for those without a full-time need 
5) Special Situations communication plans -- such as crisis communications, mergers & acquisitions, facilities openings and closing
6) Working with Understaffed Communication and Marketing Teams at Fortune 500 companies

Lynne Franklin Wordsmith

2019 Glenview Road

Glenview, Illinois 60025

847-729-5716

www.yourwordsmith.com

www.linkedin.com/in/lynnefranklin 

http://twitter.com/lynnefranklin 

 
Free
One-Hour
Consultation
Do you have a corporate, marketing or financial/investor communication challenge or project? Spend up to an hour with Lynne -- on the phone or in person.  She promises to give you some ideas and tactics you can use right away. The two of you can determine if she's the right solution to help beyond this -- and if not, she will do her best to find someone who is. 
 
To schedule this, contact her at 847-729-5716 or

lynne@yourwordsmith.com