Relationships Tip Tuesdays – November 3, 2026

Are You Waiting for the Right Time?

I sit with couples who are frequently waiting for the right time. You may be thinking, “The right time for what?” The right time to talk about . . . .

Most couples experience cycles. For example, you may have a fight with your mate. Things may have gone quiet, but you are saving up the things that you wanted to say and the points you were intent on making. However, since the argument is over, you save up the points you were going to make for later. Yet, later you and your mate are both in a good mood, then you may think, “Well, I should bring up the discussion that we were having the other night so that we can resolve it. But . . . things are going so well right now that I hate to rock the boat. So, I will just sweep it under the carpet for now.”

The problem is, I may not exactly see the problem under the carpet, but at some point I am likely to trip over the lump. And when I do – we will we repeat the original argument, and probably with more intensity. So, we ask ourselves, “When is the right time to revisit a topic in order to resolve it?”

Actually, it is those very times when we don’t want to. When things are calm and the relationship is friendly, is the perfect time. The key is, how you revisit the argument. One possible approach is to say something like, “I am enjoying our time together right now, and I want us to continue to have a great evening. And it actually seems like the perfect time to resolve our disagreement from the other day. I have thought about what you said, and I can see the merits of your idea. I wonder if we could talk about it further.” This just might be the door you have been looking for.