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The SCCoop
Words on Wellness
May 2019
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As we close out the year, we'd once again like to thank all of our volunteers and fellow board members.
All are welcome to attend our Annual Meeting on June 6 at 7 pm, at the McLean Community Center. We'll review our year, discuss plans for next year, say farewell to departing board members, and welcome new members to the board.
As always,
let us know
how the SCC can help in your community, school, and home!
Brad Kuebler, President, and Elizabeth Hale, President Elect
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Faith Community/Law Enforcement Meeting
Last week the SCC brought together law enforcement and faith leaders who work with youth in our area. After reviewing the activities different congregations have going on this spring and summer, Officer Scott Davis, FCPD and McLean High School's School Resource Officer, discussed his strategies for working with teens, the 2,250 kids at McLean HS that he considers his own. Stressing the importance of meeting teens where they are, whether that be the current music or video games they like, or last night's big rivalry game, baseballs stats, and the relative merits of Chick-fil-A vs Chipotle, Officer Davis works to get to know his kids and asks how they are. While vaping continues to be a problem in area schools and he does have law enforcement responsibilities, he doesn't want students to see him as just a cop but as a guy they can talk to in any situation. Research shows that if teens have 3 adults to whom they can turn (known as "protective factors" in the Three to Succeed program, see Reading List below), they are better able to navigate the teen years and difficulties they may face.
Following Officer Davis's presentation, SCC Mental Health Committee Member Sarah Tyler, LCSW, shared information about teen brain development and what cognitive and social-emotional development we can expect at different stages with youth ministers. Sarah suggested strategies for building relationships with teens (see Reading List below). And then the group shared their experiences and advice in handling actual situations with teens. We are hopeful this group can continue to work together even as they address different aspects of youths' lives.
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McLean Day
Thanks to everyone who came out and visited our face painting station!
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Prom Cards and Project Sticker Shock
This spring the SCC brought back its popular Prom Notes program in a new format. Prom Notes used to be written by elementary kids reminding high schools to make responsible choices on prom night and were inserted in ticket envelopes. When schools started using electronic tickets, we lost the delivery mechanism. But thanks to an idea from Flowers&Plants in McLean, we have partnered with FCPD to put cards in corsage and boutonnière boxes reminding teens not to get in a car with an impaired driver. We delivered cards to local florists ahead of area prom nights.
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In addition, together with FCPD and our Youth Advisory Committee, we put stickers on beer and wine cooler bottles at local stores ahead of prom night. These stickers remind parents and others of the penalties for buying alcohol for underage students.
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Our Annual Meeting will be held at the McLean Community Center, Thursday, June 6 at 7 pm. All are welcome! We will review our programs and activities for the year, say farewell to outgoing board members and welcome new ones, and start planning for next year. We love community input and hope to see some supporters there!
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Three to Succeed: The Factors that Matter
Data from the Fairfax County Youth Survey reinforce decades of research that show that when youth have protective factors, or assets, in their lives, they do better in lots of different areas. Having just three protective factors dramatically reduces the likelihood that youth will engage in risky behaviors. The Youth Survey shows that ever protective factor makes a difference.
The Youth Survey asks students about the “protective factors” in their lives – things like being able to turn to a parent or neighbor for help, participating in community service and extracurricular activities, and having teachers who recognize good effort. Survey results consistently show that the more protective factors youth have, the more likely they are to make healthy decisions and cope well with life’s stresses. For example, among students reporting they have no protective factors, over 30% report using marijuana. However, only 11% of students with three protective factors use marijuana...and fewer than 3% of students with six protective factors use it.
These patterns are the same year after year and they show up for all kinds of issues and behaviors, not just substance use. Bullying, signs of depression and thoughts of suicide, even healthy eating and physical activity are strongly associated with protective factors. The patterns hold true for all demographic groups: boys, girls, students of all races and ethnicities, straight and LGBTQ youth, and military connected youth all do better when they have more protective factors.
So how do we ensure that all kids have protective factors in their lives? The
Three to Succeed
campaign is based on the idea that having just three protective factors dramatically improves the odds for youth. If we can ensure that each young person in Fairfax County has at least one protective factor at home, at school, and in the community, we will have made a real difference.
Quite often, a “real life protective factor” is a caring adult...and being a caring adult in the life of a youth can be surprisingly simple. Take some time to recognize and praise good effort in a youth you know. Lend an ear and listen to their concerns. Let them know you are always there if they need help. Support their participation in community activities.
You can learn more about these and all of the factors that matter by visiting
Three to Succeed
.
Source: FCPS and Fairfax County Government, https://www.fcps.edu/blog/three-succeed-factors-matter-youth
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Ten Tips for Building Relationships with Teens
- Less is more. Teens are less likely to hear us if we say same thing over and over.
- Stay calm and responsive. Avoid being reactive.
- Don’t fix it. Sit with it. Sit with the sad. Sit with the angry. Sit with the uncomfortable.
- Don’t take it personally. Teen decision making is over influenced by emotion. A wall is punched or someone is cussed out before the teen has realized what he/she has said or done.
- Expect teens to be self-absorbed. Understand the teen is meeting this developmental milestone.
- Show up consistently. Create “office hours” where teens can find you regularly at same time and place. Have mints in bowl or other items that they can associate and expect in your space.
- Value the power of presence. Being present matters even if it seems we are having no impact when a teen does not initiate conversation or show positive emotion or attitude.
- Be creative while you talk to teens. Consider icebreakers such as taking a walk, having them help you with bulletin board or hanging flyers, or sharing funny videos.
- Find common ground or an area of interest. Discuss video games, music, pets, vacations, chores they hate, favorite YouTube video, favorite food, favorite movie.
- Never say never. Teens can change over night. One day they hate something and the next day they can like it. Always keep the door of possibility open.
Source: Sarah Tyler LCSW
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Safe Community Coalition | mcleanscc.org
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