Lesbians of Palm Springs and the Coachella Valley Outings and Events
Community. Courage. Connection
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THE LIFE LOG
🌵Getting ready to head north. The guest bedroom has become the official packing and staging area, looking less like a place for visitors and more like a FEMA staging area preparing for an extended season of soup, sweaters, and rain.
The more time we have to pack, the more our standards begin to collapse. First it’s what we need. Then what we think we’ll need. Then suddenly you carefully finding room for three extra jigsaw, six books I probably won’t read, and a jacket for every possible variation of “cool evening by the ocean.”
At this point I have enough dry goods packed to survive an entire summer. Crackers, Coffee, pasta, oatmeal. Somewhere along the line packing for cooler weather started to resemble provisioning a lighthouse keeper.
And despite all this preparation, there will absolutely be something forgotten. There always is. Last year it was the phone chargers. One year it was rain gear during a week of biblical drizzle. Human beings can transport fourteen tote bags across international borders and still forget the one thing they actually use every day.
Still, we have not crossed into U-Haul trailer territory, and I would like to preserve that tiny shred of dignity if possible.
FROM KIM
We are the walking wounded navigating the salt flats of each other’s judgments.
Lately I’ve been wondering if, in some way, all of us are neurodivergent. Not necessarily clinically, not always diagnostically, but humanly. The statistical definition of normal is simply the average of variance, yet we treat “normal” like some holy grail shimmering out on the horizon. If only I were normal. If only I checked all the right boxes. Then no one could reject me, judge me, hurt me.
Normal becomes an emotional safety blanket stitched together from conformity. Say the right things. Wear the right clothes. Echo the correct narratives. Learn the choreography of belonging and never miss a step.
But Brené Brown makes an important distinction: fitting in is not belonging. Fitting in is shape-shifting. It is scanning the room and becoming who you think you need to be in order to survive it. It is sanding down your rough edges, swallowing opinions, disguising quirks, masking pain, editing yourself into something more acceptable. Belonging, on the other hand, asks something far more terrifying. It asks us to arrive as we actually are.
The internet has become a sprawling atlas of neurodivergence. Quizzes asking if you have ADHD. Articles about autism in women. Charts explaining executive dysfunction. Endless checklists attempting to decode why some of us feel like loose threads in the fabric of ordinary life. Women especially seem to move through a maze of late diagnoses, hidden exhaustion, and the quiet realization that they have spent decades performing normal while privately drowning.
And perhaps that is why so many of these conversations resonate. Most of us carry some private eccentricity, some trait or habit that makes friends tilt their heads and say, “Interesting.” The thing we try to hide. The thing we mask. The thing that makes us nervous when someone notices. The forgotten text messages. The overstimulation. The obsessive thinking. The inability to sit still. The emotional intensity. The awkwardness. The hyperfocus. The strange collections of fears and comforts and rituals that make us uniquely ourselves.
Shame grows best in secrecy. So we become actors in our own lives, carefully curating versions of ourselves we hope will be easier to love. We fear that if people truly saw us, they would quietly slide their chairs away from the table.
But I wonder if the real loneliness comes not from being different, but from exhausting ourselves trying not to be.
Maybe belonging is not finding people who think we are flawless. Maybe it is finding people who can sit comfortably beside our contradictions. People who do not require perfection as the entry fee for connection. People who understand that every human being limps a little internally.
I think about the small private rehearsals so many of us perform every day. The woman sitting in her car gathering herself before walking into a crowded room. The man rereading a text five times, trying to remove any possibility of misunderstanding. The friend laughing a beat too late because they are still trying to decode the conversation. The person lying awake at 2 a.m. replaying an awkward comment from three years ago while the rest of the world sleeps peacefully on.
Most of us are far more fragile than we appear in public. Beneath the polished profiles, the practiced confidence, the carefully curated identities, many of us are simply trying to make peace with the parts of ourselves we were once taught to hide.
And perhaps that is the quiet truth beneath all of this talk of normalcy, diagnosis, fitting in, and belonging: nobody crosses this life unwounded. We are all carrying invisible things. Old humiliations. Private griefs. Strange wiring. Tenderness disguised as coping mechanisms. We are all, in some form, improvising our humanity as we go.
The miracle is not that some people are perfectly normal. The miracle is that, despite our awkwardness and contradictions, we continue reaching for one another anyway.
The walking wounded, navigating the white salt flats of each other’s judgments, still hoping to be recognized, still hoping someone will wave us closer and say: you do not have to pretend here.
Kim
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There is beauty in not belonging everywhere. It means the right place still waits. Fitting in will never be worth the price of leaving yourself behind. What sets you apart is what keeps you whole. Remember, difference is not your flaw. It is your signature.
Soulxsigh
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THIS WEEK’S HIGHLIGHTS
✍️ The Coachella Valley Ladies of Justice meet Sunday at The Social Cafe and Lounge at 2:30 p.m. for Coffee Talk.
✨ Women's Social Wednesday, May 20 from 5:30-7pm at the Saffron Restaurant and Lounge, 1107 N. Palm Canyon
✍️
🎭 Movie Meetup:
🎭 The Rhythm of the Week at Gertie’s Salon & Bar
We’re keeping the vibes high and the drinks flowing as our weekly live music residency continues at Gertie's Salon & Bar, dedicated to all us feisty desert women!
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Wednesdays | 5 PM – 7 PM Join us for the smooth, captivating sounds of Darling Sonitos. It’s the ultimate way to celebrate making it halfway through the week.
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Sundays | 4 PM – 7 PM Close out your weekend with the incredible Gennine Francis. Grab a cocktail, find a cozy spot, and let her stunning vocals set the mood for the week ahead.
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WOMEN WHO LIFTED THE BAR
Ugandan influencer and comedian Aleti Crystal says she has created a business in which women hire her to physically confront abusive, violent, or exploitative men. According to the story, women contact her when they feel trapped, unheard, or unsafe, especially in situations involving domestic abuse, cheating, intimidation, or financial manipulation. She presents herself as a kind of street-level avenger, stepping into spaces where women feel police, families, or communities have failed them.
Part performance, part vigilantism, part social commentary, her actions have gone viral because they tap into something deeper than spectacle: the raw frustration of women who are tired of being told to endure harm quietly. The fascination surrounding her is less about violence itself and more about the emotional symbolism behind it. She has become, for many viewers, a walking expression of rage against systems that too often ask women to absorb abuse politely while institutions move at glacial speed or not at all.
But beneath the sensational headline sits a far more troubling question: what does it say about a society when women begin turning to vigilantes for protection? When women celebrate someone “beating abusive men” as empowerment, it reflects not triumph but institutional collapse. It points toward failures in policing, courts, cultural norms, economic systems, and community accountability. Across many societies, women report violence repeatedly and are ignored, mocked, endangered further, or forced into impossible choices by financial dependence and social pressure. Into that vacuum steps someone like Aleti Crystal, not because vigilantism is an ideal solution, but because desperation breeds alternative systems of protection.
History shows that when formal systems fail vulnerable groups, people begin building parallel networks for survival. Going forward, women organizing cannot rely solely on charismatic individuals or reactive outrage. Sustainable protection comes from women building durable structures: legal advocacy networks, emergency housing, economic cooperatives, female-centered political organizing, neighborhood safety systems, mentorship circles, independent media, and rapid-response community alliances. The deeper lesson is not that women need more vigilantes. It is that societies ignoring violence against women long enough eventually create conditions where informal justice begins to look reasonable. And that should alarm everyone.
Aleti Crystal: The Viral Content Creator Confronting Abusive Men
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COMMUNITY CALENDAR SNAPSHOT
🎶 Please check venues for updates or possible changes.
Entertainment
The V Wine Lounge
Music and martinis take place on Saturdays from 5-8 PM. Additionally, Leanna Rogers and Miguel perform on Mondays from 5-8 PM ($7.50 cover charge).
The Roost Gennine Francis performs this Saturday at 6 PM; reservations are available at ticketbud.com. Marisa Corvo will perform at 6:30 PM on the following Wednesdays: May 13, 27; June 10, 24; July 8, 22; August 5, 19; and September 16, 30. Tickets are available at ticketbud.com.
Indian Wells Resort Hotel Patrice Morris performs on Saturdays at 6 PM. A cover charge applies, and reservations are suggested.
Gertie's Salon and Bar (Alice B's Restaurant) Gennine Francis will be performing this Sunday from 4-6 PM.
Hyatt, Palm Springs Leanna and the Free Agents perform on Thursdays and Fridays from 6-8 PM.
🪩 Social
Mahjong (American) Thursdays 1pm to 3:30pm
Weekly Chat Group - Zoom - Thursdays 5PM
🌿 Outdoors
Bird Walks – 2nd & 4th Thursdays | Prescott Preserve
Easy/Moderate/Difficult Hikes – Tuesdays & Saturdays
Easy Walk - Fridays
💬 Community & Support
PALS Seminars & Death Café
Evening Chat Group – Thursdays 5 PM
BAM Book & Movie Club – Monthly
Scroll down to COMMUNITY CALENDAR DETAILS for more information on these events
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JUNETEENTH
Join Sweet Baby J’ai and the Sunset Music and Education Foundation for a powerful afternoon of storytelling, poetry, music, culture, and community as we celebrate Juneteenth 2026 at Revolution Stage Company as part of Palm Springs’ XOXO Festival Weekend.This free community gathering honors the spirit of Juneteenth through artistic expression, reflection, resilience, and joy. Featuring spoken word, live music, special cultural presentations, and inspiring performances from SMARTS Initiative students, the afternoon is designed to bring people together across generations and backgrounds.
More than an event, this is a celebration of freedom, creativity, connection, and the continuing journey forward. Saturday, June 20, 20262 PM – 4 PM
Revolution Stage Company Palm Springs, CA FREE Admission | Ticket Required. Tickets @ www.sunsetmusic.org.
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Shann Carr for “Marilyn’s Morning After SNARKitecture Bus Tour”
Join comedian Shann Carr for “Marilyn’s Morning After SNARKitecture Bus Tour” on Sunday May 31st. Enjoy a funny, 90-minute bus tour serving “The Tea with Sugar and Shade.” Tix are available at shanncarr.com
On what would have been Marilyn Monroe‘s 100th birthday weekend, Shann dishes about Marilyn and tells stories about some of Palm Springs’ most iconic women and some men too. Shann weaves together humor and actual history, gossip and sketchy-fact-filled stories and all with the skills crafted through a life-long professional comedy career.
On May 31st hop onto “Marilyn’s Morning After SNARKitecture Bus Tour” that Shann designed as a compliment to PS Pride’s “Marilyn 100 Guinness World Record” event the day before. Shann’s 2 private tours will depart at 10am and 12pm, from in front of the PS Art Museum. 20% of the proceeds from these 2 Tours will go to support PS Pride
For tickets go to www.shanncarr.com
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INDOOR PICKLEBALL DRILL CLINIC
DESERT RECREATION DISTRICT
📍 Palm Desert Community Center Gymnasium
43-900 San Pablo Ave, Palm Desert
TUESDAYS: ADVANCED DRILL AND PLAY
7:00 – 8:30 A.M.
WEDNESDAYS: BEGINNERS / ADVANCED BEGINNERS
7:00 – 8:30 A.M.
FRIDAYS: INTERMEDIATES
7:00 – 8:30 A.M.
MONTHLY FEE: $95
Please register by scanning the QR code or by visiting:
myrecreationdistrict.com/sports
Or call: (760) 568-9697 for more information
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SUMMER SERIES
ROUND ROBIN TOURNAMENT
(Desert Recreation District)
DATES:
May 24th, June 28th, July 26th,
Aug 30th, Sep 27th
SCHEDULE:
7:30 A.M. Singles and Skinny Singles
8:30 A.M. Rotating Partners – All Levels and Genders
10:00 A.M. Women’s Doubles – All Levels
11:30 A.M. Men’s Doubles – All Levels
1:00 P.M. Mixed Doubles – All Levels
Times subject to change
REGISTRATION:
Fee: $20
Additional $10 per event
REGISTER:
Scan the QR code or visit:
MyRecreationDistrict.com/Sports
📞 (760) 568-9697
✉️ Mary Barsaleau: Mgbarsaleau@gmail.com
📍 Palm Desert Community Center Gymnasium
43-900 San Pablo Ave, Palm Desert
| | COMMUNITY EVENTS DETAIL & SIGNUPS | | |
Mahjong (American)
1PM to 3:30pm Thursdays
In a private home for summer.
Mahjong Signup
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Every Month Bird Watching Walks at Prescott Preserve
Join OLT Volunteer Kurt Kosek for bird watching walks at Prescott Preserve every 2nd and 4th Thursday of the month at 8am. Birders of all ages and experience levels welcome. Walks are under 1.5 miles on dirt trails. The group meets at the old golf cart crosswalk on Farrell, just north of Mesquite. Plenty of parking on Farrell.
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The Rhythm of the Week at Gertie’s Salon & Bar
We’re keeping the vibes high and the drinks flowing as our weekly live music residency continues at Gertie's Salon & Bar, dedicated to all us feisty desert women!
-
Wednesdays | 5 PM – 7 PM Join us for the smooth, captivating sounds of Darling Sonitos. It’s the ultimate way to celebrate making it halfway through the week.
-
Sundays | 4 PM – 7 PM Close out your weekend with the incredible Gennine Francis. Grab a cocktail, find a cozy spot, and let her stunning vocals set the mood for the week ahead.
Celebrate Mother’s Day at Alice B.
This Mother’s Day, we’re honoring the women in our lives with a brunch designed for indulgence, connection, and celebration. Join us at Alice B. for exceptional flavors and curated hospitality as we toast to the mothers, mentors, and matriarchs in our lives.
Whether you're gathering with your favorite group of women or just bringing Mom, we invite you to relax and enjoy a spectacular menu in the heart of Palm Springs.
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When: Sunday, May 10th
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Where: Alice B. Restaurant and Gertie's Salon & Bar
Reservations are highly recommended. Spaces fill up quickly for this special tradition—secure your table today and let us take care of the rest. OPEN TABLE
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BAM ( Book and Movie) discussion group
We are a book and movie club that has been meeting online since 2020. All participants have the opportunity to select a book or movie for the group and to lead the discussion the month the group reads or views their selection.
May meeting: The Book Woman of Troublesome Creek by Michele Richardson, hosted by Dee
June meeting: The Lotus Shoes by Jane Yang, hosted by Gail
July: Hamnet, the book by Maggie O'Farrell; and the movie with screenplay by Maggie O'Farrell and Chloe Zhao,nhosted by Flynn
August: "Elaine", movie, hosted by Gail
September: So Gay for You: Friendship, Found Family and the Show that Started it All (based on the multi season series "The L Word") by Kate Moennig and Leisha Hailey, hosted by Velma
For questions about BAM and to request a link for the meeting, please get in touch with Flynn Sylvest at flynnsylvest@gmail.com. Thank you!
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Lesbians Embracing Aging (LEA)
Lesbians Embracing Aging (LEA)
If you are an older lesbian and would like to connect with others, please consider joining
LEA. You can start by signing up for our monthly newsletter and then, if you’d like to
connect more often, join our private Facebook group which is about connection and
conversation, support and community – a place to lend a helping hand and uplift each
other when needed.
To sign up for the newsletter let us know here: leaofcoachellavalley@gmail.com
To sign up for the Facebook group (please note: all applicants must answer brief
questions and agree to group rules) let us know here:
(1) Facebook
To attend the monthly LEA Zoom meeting mark your calendar for the second
Monday of each month at 11: 00 AM
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/82977588013?pwd=urfkjO44hhwpBbKU1OIZDnPfJlbg0R.1
To read LEA’s mission Triangle Care Management
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Presents
2026 BLUES AT THE WOODSTOCK
Dedicated to preserving the music of traditional/classic women blues artists:
VOICES THAT DON’T ASK FOR PERMISSION!
SEPTEMBER 3-6, 2026
HOTEL ZOSO, Palm Springs, CA
TICKETS ON SALE – MAY 8, 2026
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Easy/Moderate/Difficult Hikes
On Hold for Summer, Starting again in October
Hikes are Tuesdays and Saturdays, weather permitting..
Sign up below to receive hiking information
New hikers must register and sign a waiver.
Sign up below for email notifications.
With the heat now, hikes are pretty much over for the season
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2026 Walks
On Hold for Summer, Starting again in October
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Evening Chat Group 5pm to 6:30pm PST Every Thursday (new day of week)
Join us for a lively Zoom chat, catch up with friends, and make new ones! Open to Lesbians in and out of the Coachella Valley — California — all 50 States — and beyond. Please email JayneStrelecki@gmail.com to receive the weekly invite & reminder with Zoom meeting ID and Passcode. Bring a friend! Hosted by Cindy T and Jayne!
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Entertainment - This Week's Recommendation
The Sheep Detectives is an irresistibly charming little mystery that leaves you grinning. It’s light, funny, and full of heart, with sheep characters so expressive and lovable that you can’t help rooting for them. The humor is gentle and clever, and the story celebrates teamwork and kindness without ever feeling heavy-handed.
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Go Girl! Saugatuck is an inclusive-of-all on the female spectrum women’s weekend just two miles from Lake Michigan that’s been kicking it since 2016.
May 29-31st
Comedy, Burlesque, Drag Kings, Live Music followed by women DJs will fill your nights after days jammed with workshops, pool games, women vendors whose Pride is usually the same or the following weekend!
ALL EVENTS FROM FRIDAY THROUGH SUNDAY ARE AT THE DUNES RESORT EXCLUSIVELY, the largest gay resort in the country. Yes, The Dunes is popular and kinda pricey, but we’ve arranged for no extra per person charges so fill up those rooms and come co-create a fine community at Go Girl! Saugatuck.
Go Girl Saugatuck
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Lesbian Owned Business
Barbara Carpenter Realtor
Shann Carr -Comedian, Event Producer, Realtor, A Lesbian Concierge In The Desert
Andrea Voras, Gerontologist Dementia Specialist Life Aging Life Care Manager
Constance Clare-Newman, Somatic Work for Pain Relief and Stress Reduction
Corlyce Photography
Chris Ann Kallgren Realtor
Sunny Designs-Website & Graphic Design & Video
Rice Notary
Nancy Minger - Massage Therapist
Poochsitter
Motivation Changes — Life Coaching - Dr Ann Sarah Engel, MSW, PhD
B's Table
Community Resources
Local Lesbian Authors
Pickleball Tip of the Week
For more information about pickleball, including lessons, leagues, and other lesbians playing pickleball - contact Mary Barsaleau.
Mary is a registered Pickleball Ambassador.
Animal Samaritans - Pets for Adoption Fur babies needing family at Animal Samaritans
Shelter — Animal Samaritans
Special Thanks to Frontrunners for their ongoing support of LPSCV
Palm Springs Front Runners & Walkers is a running and walking club for members and friends of the LGBTQ+ community in the Coachella Valley. We are a local chapter of International Front Runners, an informal network of LGBTQ+ running groups around the world. Membership is open to everyone without regard to ability, ethnicity, gender, or sexual orientation. Join for daily runs and walks! Palm Springs Front Runners & Walkers - Home
Valerie Milano
Senior Editor, The Hollywood Times
The L-Fund will also honor The Hollywood Times’ own Senior Editor, Valerie Milano, whose career in entertainment journalism has been defined by visibility, authenticity, and advocacy. Through decades of reporting, interviews, and festival coverage, Milano has ensured LGBTQ+ stories are told with heart and integrity, bringing community narratives to a global audience. She will receive The L-Fund’s Ambassador Award, recognizing her role as a trusted voice and connector within media and the LGBTQ+ community. https://l-fund.org/#
Hollywood Times - Valerie Milano
| | PALS - Planning Ahead for LGBTQ Seniors | | |
PALS no-cost seminars provide up-to-date info and resources to own your
future, engage in essential conversations and take action because it’s never too soon to start planning ahea
For program updates and to sign up for upcoming PALS Seminars, Death Cafes and PALS Circles, please visit palsinthedesert.com.
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PALS Death Cafe at 2 pm on the 1st Thurs each month provides a group
led and safe space to have open conversations about death and dying without taboo.
For program updates and to sign up for upcoming PALS Seminars, Death Cafes and PALS Circles, please visit palsinthedesert.com.
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.PALS CIRCLE for an hour of connection, support and friendship among
LGBTQ+ seniors and allies. No formal topic — just fun conversation and
camaraderie each Monday from 6:00 to 7:00 PM on ZOOM.
For program updates and to sign up for upcoming PALS Seminars, Death Cafes and PALS Circles, please visit palsinthedesert.com.
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Gay Country Western Dancing - Saturday Nights
Join the Dance Ranch for a great night of country western dancing, including two-step, waltz, shadow, East and West Coast swing, and line dances.
It all happens at Step By Step
933 Crossley Road, Palm Springs.
Admission is $5
Lesson is at 7pm. Dancing from 7:30-9:30pm
Dance Ranch Palm Springs is a country western dance group serving the LGBTQ+ community and its friends. Country dancers of all levels are welcome!
Learn more about Dance Ranch and find out what they’re teaching at danceranchps.org.
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