Update: Social and One-to-One descriptions have been corrected.

Same Enneagram Type.

So Why Are They So Different?

 

I was working with a client this week, debriefing his Enneagram report, when he said:


“I shared my type with my boss this week, and they were surprised I was an Enneagram 1 because I’m so different from the other 1s on our team.”


That statement gave us so much to work with.


Why can two people with the same Enneagram type look so different?


The Enneagram isn’t about figuring out what box someone belongs in. At its core, it helps us understand the motivation behind why people show up the way they do. When we understand that motivation, we have far more possibilities for how we work with ourselves and with each other.


But our Enneagram type is only part of the story.


Type helps us understand what motivates us. Instinct helps us understand what gets our attention. Over the next three months, we’ll explore how each instinct adds nuance to the way an Enneagram type shows up in everyday life and leadership. But first, let’s understand the three Instincts.


One of the deeper layers of the Enneagram is our Instincts, and they influence what gets our attention as we move through our days.


We have all three: Self-Preservation, Social, and One-to-One (often called the Sexual instinct). We have access to all three, but we don’t necessarily give them equal attention.

 
 
 

Self Preservation

Focuses attention on resources, well-being, comfort, and what is needed to feel secure and supported. This might show up as paying attention to time, money, food, health, home, or creating a sense of stability.

 
 

One-to-One

Focuses attention on energy, chemistry, intensity, and what feels especially alive or compelling. This might show up as being drawn toward experiences, ideas, or people that create a sense of charge, connection, or transformation.

 
 

Social

Focuses attention on belonging, contribution, roles, and what is happening within the larger group or system. This might show up as noticing who is included, how people are connected, or what the group needs in order to thrive.

 
 

Same Enneagram type. Same core motivation. Different focus of attention.


So while Enneagram 1s may be motivated by a desire to do what is right, responsible, or good, that motivation can show up very differently. One person may focus on creating order and stability. Another person may be especially attuned to improving the group or system. Another person may bring much more intensity to what they believe needs to change.


My client’s boss wasn’t wrong to notice that he looked different from the other 1s.


The mistake would be assuming that one of them is somehow “more of a 1” than the others. And this is why I’m cautious when someone says, “Oh, you’re a 1. I know exactly what that means.”


They probably don’t.


Knowing someone’s type should make you more curious about them, not more certain about them.


The goal isn’t to figure out which Instinct box you or someone else belongs in. It’s to notice where attention naturally goes, and where it doesn’t.


The next time two people of the same Enneagram type show up radically differently, get curious:


What might each person be paying attention to that the other isn’t?


That kind of curiosity is where the Enneagram becomes especially useful for leaders. You stop assuming you know someone because you know their type, and start understanding more deeply what shapes how they move through the world.


If you would like support in better understanding your team, we would love to facilitate a workshop for you. Please reach out.

 
 
 

"The team loved the framework and how practical and actionable it is."

-Workshop Participant

 
 

Resources

 

Archive Newsletters


Browse our prior newsletters for a refresher on a specific topic related to the Enneagram at work.

 
 

iEQ9 Enneagram Test


In just 30 minutes, the iEQ9 Enneagram Test will provide you with a profound understanding of your own psychology and help you tap into your innate brilliance.

 
 
 
 
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