BY TAMARA STRIJACK
I sit here listening to the lyrics of a song my daughter wrote when she was 15, and it brings me right back:
I’m floating away, seems my mind just won’t stay in my brain.
It’s all just a haze and the ghosts overtake me, no escape … no escape.
I’m going in circles … what happened to “everything’s okay?”
I’m stumbling through it all,
I’ll get there some day.
Circles … stumbling … no escape.
I think back to my own writing and the angst that filled the pages of my journal at that age. Here are some re-discovered excerpts, just to give you a little window:
I am being overtaken,
my mind is being invaded …
It has gone far beyond not understanding,
I am in the depths of despair …
Looking for a clearing,
a fire exit,
a bathtub plug.
Anything to drain the undesired pandemonium
from my consciousness …
What is it about the uncomfortable space between? No longer a child, and yet yearning for the innocence and simplicity of childhood. Not yet an adult, and yet glimpsing the seeming freedoms of adulthood that are just out of reach. Not there yet. And not able to hold on.
Tamara will be speaking on the topic of adolescence and emotional health in our upcoming Saturday Seminar on November 21st (see below).