The Essential Guide to Dating Your Next Chapter
As you power down on 2019 (it already seems so last year…) and power up on your #2020vision4change it is fitting that a new year, hallmarked by a new decade, should also include a new next chapter of life! Like any good relationship, this pivot into what’s next needs to be flirted with and explored. That is where the GOLD is! Let the courting begin!
Meet your next chapter right where you are:
It’s an awareness. A vibe. A feeling. Next chapters are born. They begin with subtle signs and innuendos, perhaps gut level decisions or thoughts that beg to answer…” What if?” You won’t need to travel far to find it, you will just need to be open to the journey. This new awareness, readiness, almost acceptance that something is about to shift is your starting point.
Be YOU. Be on brand. Be kind. Be:
Say what you mean and mean what you say. Show up authentically, not as you envision others would want you to, but rather in a way that is reflective of running the business of you. You are the CEO of yourself and the single longest relationship you will ever encounter. Take ownership of that. You can’t step into a next chapter until you are able to define your role in the current one. Get straight on your story…even the messy parts that you have pushed away. Your story, this unique brand of YOU is what gives you grit and provides you with traction. It is also the essence of the legacy you have built and are ready to expand upon. Think of it as your foundation. Your story is the reason you want what you want. Without owning your story, you cannot fully commit to your purpose.
Seek the unknown:
One of the perks exposed in the process of dating is the rush of the unknown. The unfamiliar getting-to-know-you phase is seeped with energy and excitement. Yet, in our daily lives, it is often this same unfamiliar territory that stops us from participating and robs us of possibilities. The unknown is where fear lives…and it is also where growth and renewal are possible. Seeking the unknown shuts down fear. Why? Simply because if you are curious and exploring what you don’t already know, you are focused on the moment and the experience and fear has little place there. Dating your next chapter or dating your next significant other both involve exploring people, places, and things you do not already know. An essential pillar of any next chapter is your ability to take risks and to try new things.
Go out on the date:
Dating involves being in action and seeing what fits. You need to use a calendar, commit to a day and a time, set up a place to meet. Thinking about dating is not dating any more than thinking about pivoting is actually pivoting. Both involve thought, detail, research, agreement and planning that result in actions taken. That is what drives change. Dating is not etched in stone. Either is your next chapter. It is an exploration, a journey that unfolds or does not, because the choice is YOURS.
Every relationship takes work. It requires some level of consistency, respect, give-and-take. Not every moment will be stellar. In order to go the distance, your relationship to someone you date and your relationship to yourself when pivoting both need to withstand good and bad times, to have tenacity and commitment to the bigger picture and the larger goal.
Fall in love:
Dating successfully needs to ignite your happy place. It needs to ground you, elate you, and it needs to make you smile. Dating someone or dating your next chapter should fulfill you, bring intelligent thought and conversation into your life. Done correctly, you will fall in love with yourself, with the process, and with the moment every bit as much as you fall in love with another person. Allow love in. This begins with self-love. Dating your next chapter is not about completing you. Instead it is about connecting you…to YOU. The magic is in that relationship. It is only then that you can authentically love another.
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