Miami Valley 
Unitarian Universalist Fellowship

8690 Yankee St.  Dayton, OH  45458






MVUUF's Forum for November, 2019

  visit our website  HERE          visit the UUA's website    HERE


Service Topics for November, 2019

Sunday, November 3rd   11:00 AM
UU-UNO Fundraiser Kick-Off 
with MVUUF's High School Youth Group 
Sunday, November 10th   11:00 AM
Dreaming Together:  Exploring Our Shared Ministry
with Rev. Kellie
Sunday, November 17th   11:00 AM
Real Attention Needs Empathy
with Rev. Kellie 
Sunday, November 24th   11:00 AM
Worship for All Ages:  Thanksgiving
with DRE Jerry Leggett & Rev. Kellie 

---   ---   ---   ---   ---   ---   ---   ---   ---

Our Nursery is available for all children during 
before-service programming (starting at 9:30 AM)
and children younger than our preschool* class 
during the Worship Service.

Our Worship for All Ages services are intentionally multi-generational 
so that young people preschool-aged* and older may happily participate
in the entire Worship Service.

For our other Worship Services, all young people preschool-aged* 
and older will begin in the service and exit for their 
religious education classes after the Time for All Ages.
Please pick up children at 12:15 PM.

*Preschool students are 3 years old 
by September of the current school year.

Staff Notes

                                      FROM REV. KELLIE
My Dear Ones,

Communication can be harder than it seems. I amend that statement-let's say good communication can be harder and more elusive than it seems.
We all have different preferences for what communication modes we use when (in-person, phone, text, Facebook Messenger, or email). We have different expectations of what makes a timely response for each mode. Unfortunately for us, we often forget these differences when it comes time to communicate with one another, believing our communication partners have the same preferences and expectations as ourselves. To add to our communication difficulties, we also think the meanings of our communications are crystal clear to our partners when they are not. Then throw in the 24-hour/7-day-a-week flood of communication and information coming at us from all around us: friends, family, MVUUF, work, television, radio, and the Internet. Given all these obstacles, it is a miracle that we're able to communicate as well as we do!
A great example of this was my October 13th Sunday service, Congregational Read: The Power of Learning Together. After the service, several congregants asked me what a "Congregational Read" is and I realized---an hour too late---that I should have explained how MVUUF does our Congregational Read. Oops! This was a great reminder to me of two things:
  1. As a communicator, I sometimes incorrectly assume that my communication partners know more about my topic than they do.
  2. I need to repeat my important messages so that the greatest number of people can understand and remember them, especially repetition in different places (like The Forum, E-Blast, Facebook, Yahoo groups, announcements, and Sunday services).
  Speaking of which, let me take a moment to explain our Congregational Read. This year's Congregational Read is Centering: Navigating Race, Authenticity, and Power in Ministry, edited by Mitra Rahnema. For this year's Congregational Read, we read one essay and its response on our own each month and then meet for a 1.5-hour discussion group that I lead. Our Congregational Read discussion group meets 10:30 AM - Noon on the third Saturday of the month through June, with our next discussion group being November 16th (discussing the 2nd essay and its response). While I would love participants to attend all sessions and do all the reading, I believe that something is usually better than nothing---so please attend as many discussion groups as you can, even if you are late or haven't completed the month's reading. Here are a few final reminders:
  • Open to all MVUUF members and friends
  • Book is available through UUA Bookstore and Amazon
  • Book is available via Google eBooks and Amazon Kindle
  • If purchasing the book is cost-prohibitive, please contact me for a copy.
Alrighty, let's get back to communication. This month's Soul Matters theme of Attention gives us an opportunity to reflect on our own communication styles and reactions to the differences with our communication partners. Given all the opportunities for error---for misunderstood, forgotten, or never read messages---I am placing my Attention on grace and kindness, instead of frustration and negative judgement.
I used to describe my email communication as juggling watermelons and feathers, simultaneously. In an effort to keep the large watermelons from smashing on the ground, I sometimes miss feathers before they float away. Now that I am in my second year of solo parish ministry, I often use this metaphor for ministry itself and wonder if it might be a metaphor for many of our lives. We all are juggling so much.
In my personal life this month, I am placing my Attention on the feathers---the opportunities of connection with my loved ones---like having dinner with my son even when he'd be happier on one of his electronic devices, spending time on the phone with one of my dear friends even though I don't really have time, pulling myself away from my work to watch one of my son's memes, calling my mom instead of listening to my audiobook, taking a walk in the brisk fall air.
As usual, I have selected a song to guide us through our monthly Soul Matters theme: Season of Love from the musical, Rent. This song reminds us that our Attention matters and encourages us to fill our lives with connection and love. This month, I pray we pay Attention to connection and love, working to strengthen our bonds despite the distractions, differences, and obstacles we encounter. May we grant ourselves and our communication partners grace and kindness along the way.
Holding you in my heart, 

Rev. Kellie
How and When to Reach Me:
  • The best way to reach me is to text or call my mobile phone on my office days (847.804.4614): Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays.
  • Sundays are my main fellowship day, Tuesdays are my day off, and Fridays are my study day. On these days, please do not text or call my mobile phone unless you have a pastoral care emergency.
  • Thank you for helping me take the time I need to stay healthy and happy as your minister!
What I'm Reading (and/or What I'm Listening To):
  • Love Sense: The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships by Dr. Sue Johnson
  • The Daily podcast by the New York Times
  • Centering: Navigating Race, Authenticity, and Power in Ministry, edited by Mitra Rahnema (this year's Congregational Read, next discussion group November 16th) 

Feel free to click  HERE to get the Soul Matters packet on Attention for this month. You do not have to be a member of a Covenant Group in order to have it; the packets are available to all our Members & Friends. If you prefer a hard copy of the packet, please contact our Fellowship Administrator, Jennie Freiberger, at 937-436-3628 or and she'll make sure to get one to you.

As the days grow shorter and dark of evening arrives before supper time, I hope you will look forward to the many opportunities for fellowship and music coming up this month!

On Friday, November 8th, all are welcome to come out for our now semi-annual " Open Mic Night." This is a casual, supportive environment where you can try out your performance. Light refreshments provided but feel free to bring something to share.

On the 3rd Tuesday, November 19th, our Acoustic Folk Jam group meets at 6:30pm. So far, in addition to singers we've had guitars, banjo, dulcimer, harmonica and percussion.

Then I hope you'll come and invite friends to a special concert on Wednesday, November 20th at 7:30PM. Andew Finn Magill, professional fiddler/violinist will be our guest performing his unique blend of Cetic/Irish/Bluegrass and Jazz influenced music. You can order your tickets by clicking  HERE!
And finally, our traditional Wassail music worship service on Sunday, December 8th will include a children's choir performance and special holiday music featuring our Worship Choir. I would love to have more singers join us! There will be two Saturday rehearsals: November 23rd and December 7th, at 11:00AM for those who aren't able to come to regular Wednesday evening rehearsals. 
 ---Sara Davis, Director of Music

(Jerry Leggett, our Director of Religious Education, has been spending extra time with his wife, Patsy, in Tubac, AZ at their home as she recovers from a couple recent surgeries. Let's continue to send Patsy & Jerry our best wishes for healing & recovery...and look forward to hearing more from Jerry VERY soon!) 
Fun Things To Do This Month

                                  Sunday, November 10th
There will NOT be a Coffee With the Minister event this month, as the date and time (Sunday, November 1th, following the 11:00 AM Worship Service) it's usually scheduled for we will be offering the first of our Dreaming Together: Exploring Our Shared Ministry events (see more about that elsewhere in The Forum).

Look for Coffee With The Minister to continue on Sunday, December 8th!

Sunday, November 3rd, 7:00 PM, in the Sanctuary 
We had a lovely time for our first Gathering of Spirits event on Sunday evening, October 6th. Thank you to everyone that came and celebrated community with us.

Our next event is Sunday evening, November 3rd. I know that some of you may not know me or not really know what this event is. So I'd like to give a little back story on myself and why I wanted to create this new worship service. 

I've attended MVUUF for almost 20 years, I've grown up in this community. I was active in our youth programming in high school and middle school. I attended multiple UU leadership schools in high school and led several training cons. Even though I've been a part of this fellowship for most of my life I still sometimes struggle to find more intimate and tight knit community here as a young adult. I was often asked after high school what we needed to do to bring in young adults, and that's hard because we're often busy with school and work and some of us with young children. Some of us just don't want to wake up at 10am on a Sunday morning, and that's okay. For several years I worked on Sundays and couldn't attend Sunday morning service, and I really forgot what this community means to me and how connected I feel to Unitarian universalism. So recently I came up with this evening worship service. I wanted a way to build community and embrace another way to worship together. 

Circle worship is something that I hold very dear and is something that I've spent a lot of time planning and being a part of in high school at youth conferences. I really wanted to bring a part of that home and share it with the fellowship. I want this to be a community-built service and I encourage people of all ages to come and experience it. Every service will be a little different depending on who's planning it. I believe we could all use a little more community and unconditional love!  I hope that you do, too and will come out to celebrate each other together.

Any questions or concerns? Please contact me, Somaya Bernard, at

Thursday, November 14th, 11:30 AM, MCL Cafeteria, in Kettering
If you identify as a woman, you should think about joining this fun group of ladies as they celebrate birthdays every month! They usually meet on the second Thursday of the month, 11:30 AM, at MCL Cafeteria in Kettering. This month, they'll be meeting on Thursday, November 14th.
If you're going to attend, please make sure to RSVP to Allie Petersen at

                     DAYTIME BOOK CLUB
Wednesday, November 20th, 10:30 AM, 
in the Founders' Room
This well-read group meets on the third Wednesday of every month, 10:30 AM, in the Founders' Room at MVUUF. This month, they'll gather on Wednesday, November 20th, to discuss Stay and Fight: A Novel by Madeline Fitch.

They've also selected several books 
for the coming months:

December 18th - Dinner with Edward: 
A Story of Unexpected Friendship by Isabel Vincent
January 15th - The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
February 19th - The Sun Does Shine 
by Anthony Ray Hinton
March 18th - The Ungrateful Refugee by Dina Nayeri
The group is open to all, and they'd love to have you join them!

Would you like to discuss books with other MVUUF members and friends, but are not available for our daytime group? Several people have expressed an interest in having an evening group, but we really need a few more interested people to keep a group going.

If you would like to join an evening group, please email Ann Snively by Friday, November 15th at: with the days and times that would work for you. We will meet at MVUUF and it will be up to the group to select which books to discuss.

Friday, November 15th, 6:30 PM, at MVUUF
Join us for a family-friendly game night, usually held on the third Friday of the month; this month's Game Night is scheduled for Friday, November 15th, 6:30 PM at MVUUF.  Bring a favorite game (or play games that others bring), and bring a snack to share if you can.  We look forward to your company!

Sunday mornings, 9:30 AM, in classroom #5
The group is open to ALL who identify as women, and they love to have you join them!  

The discussions are confidential with topics of general interest and those with a women's viewpoint. This month, they will focus on questions regarding Attention and the role it plays on their lives. They meet on Sunday mornings, 9:30 AM, in class room #5 in the RE hallway.  
Around the Fellowship
Anwyl Scott is the Program Council's Unsung Hero for the month of November. She is often seen wearing a hat at MVUUF, so this month "Hat's off" to Anwyl for the plethora of ways she serves the fellowship. Currently she is an essential member of the Immigration Task Force, providing transportation for immigrant's appointments, and meeting with others active in this and other inter-faith issues in the Dayton area. She is the contact person for the Daytime Book Club, making sure you know of upcoming reads and she is an active member of the Social Action Committee, sometimes filling in for that group at Program Council.

But that's right now. Previously Anwyl stepped up to be Chairperson of the Program Council (also a Board position) when leadership was hard to find, and since the PC also lacked an Operations Rep, she took on that responsibility as well, assuring that plumbing and other repairs were accomplished. She served on the Nominating Committee and on the Finance Committee. She coordinated the Women's Group email list for several years and is a regular member of that group. We can't forget that she also assists with the first, second and third graders in YRE and participated in Covenant Groups and the Congregational Read. She contributes generously to the baby shower, UU Bucks, and other projects at MVUUF and is willing to provide transportation to members when needed. 

Anwyl's email signature says, "Service is the rent we pay for living," and she lives that out here at MVUUF. "Hat's off" to Anwyl Scott, our Unsung Hero for November! 

UU United Nations Office Fundraiser Kick-Off     
Sunday, November 3rd

                  January Congregational Meeting                        
Sunday, January 19th

Rev. Kellie's 2nd Annual Valentine Open House     
Saturday, February 15th

                                              Service Auction 2020                                               
Saturday, February 29th

                   2020-2021 Pledge Drive Kick-Off                        
Sunday, March 8th

Peacebuilders' Walk     
Saturday, May 16th

June Congregational Meeting     
Sunday, June 14th

Sunday, November 10th*, 12:30-2:00 PM
Saturday, November 16th, 1-3:00 PM
Thursday, November 21st, 7-9:00 PM
Rev. Kellie and our Board of Trustees invite all MVUUF friends & members to join them in an exploration of our shared ministry. These sessions will be highly interactive, allowing us to identify who we are and imagine who we might become as Love transforms us.

If you have any questions, please contact Rev. Kellie at

* on this date a light lunch will be provided by the Board.

Saturday, November 23rd, 1:00 PM, in the Founders' Room
Membership at MVUUF is an opportunity to declare what you already know. This fellowship is your spiritual home, your community of friends, your challenge to action, your open forum for a free expression of your search for truth, and your opportunity to live what you hold dear. If all or some of these things fit your niche at MVUUF, and you are not already a member, we are presenting an opportunity just for you!

Rev. Kellie and Diane Colvin, Membership Representative, are offering a Joining Session on Saturday, November 23rd, from 1-3:00 PM, in the Founders' Room. At this session you will receive basic information about UUism, the opportunities afforded to our members, and the joys & responsibilities of sharing your time, talents and treasures as a member of the fellowship. Those wishing to become members will sign the Red Book during the Worship Service on Sunday, December 15th.

Please consider joining us! Trade in your "Friend" nametag for a permanent wooden one that shows you are committed to this fellowship and its future. If you have any questions, or would like to sign-up to attend, please contact Diane Colvin at We look forward to seeing YOU on November 23rd!

Memorial Committee Forming
From time to time, members and friends of our Fellowship experience the loss of a loved one. At such times our beloved community draws close around the bereaved, to support and console them in their time of grief.  One of the most important ways we do that is to host a memorial service, to mourn and to celebrate the life of the deceased.

Because such events cannot be planned in advance, there is often a rush to secure volunteers to serve as ushers, to help move furniture in the sanctuary, to set out and serve food, make coffee, and perform other support tasks for the service. For this reason the minister and the Pastoral Care team are seeking to form a standing Memorial Committee, consisting of people who have offered to be available for such work on short notice.

Experience indicates it usually takes 3-5 volunteers to support such a service, and since not everyone can be available all the time, we would like to have 6-10 volunteers for the Memorial Committee.  This would give us a pool to draw from, and ensure that not every member is called upon every time the committee's help is needed.

If you have been looking for a way to be more engaged with the activities of MVUUF, but your life situation makes it hard to commit to a role that involves regular meetings over a long period of time, this might be a good fit for you.  Thankfully, the need for a Memorial Committee does not arise often, and when it does, the work is shared.

If you wish to volunteer, or to know more about what the Memorial Committee's responsibilities would be, please contact Cameron Smith at: 937-367-4943, or  Once a few volunteers have come forward, he will schedule an organizational meeting, which anyone can attend. Thank you for considering this important service.  In the sorrow of bereavement
the support of our Fellowship is especially needed and deeply felt.

Have you heard? The monthly meetings of MVUUF's Board of  Trustees are open to all, and the first 10-15 minutes are provided for members & friends to ask any  questions they may have of the Board members.
The next meeting of the Board is scheduled for Sunday, November 17th, 1:30 PM, in the Founders' Room.

Remember, due to allergies, asthma, and other sensitivities of our members & friends, we ask that you please refrain from wearing scent at MVUUF (perfume, aftershave, scented hair products, lotions, etc.).

Thank you for helping us to be a safe as well as welcoming congregation!

You can order fair trade coffee after the Sunday Worship Service at MVUUF! Orders are placed on the first Sunday of the month (this month that's November 3rd!), and then your order should be ready to be picked up on the third Sunday of the month (this month that's November 17th!).

There are many varieties and bean grinds to choose from...some are even organic! For more information, feel free to contact Lynn Buffington at or 937-657-0426.

Did you know we have a lost & found box at the Fellowship? It's located in the Office area, on the floor under the long table holding all the plants!

If you think you may have lost something while at MVUUF, it's the FIRST place you'll want to look!

Showing Up for Justice
Monday, November 11th, 7:00 PM, in the Founders' Room
This group is a supportive place where white congregants can work on reducing and eliminating their own white fragility and internalized racism without harming our siblings of color. 

This group now meets on the second Monday of the month, 7:00 PM, in the Founders' Room. Questions, concerns or suggestions? Please email Rev. Kellie at .

Begins Saturday, November 2nd, 10:00 AM, in the Founders' Room
Sometimes it can be difficult to talk about issues of race. Most people do what they can to avoid hurting others in the course of our human interactions. But when it comes to race, people who identify as white can be especially concerned about saying and doing the right thing. 

I will be leading a discussion group on the book, White Fragility: Why It's So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism by Robin DiAngelo. Many in the congregation have already read this book and the interest was high! This group will be an opportunity for those of you who have not had a chance to read it and discuss it to join in a supportive circle for such a conversation. The sessions will be held on the first Saturday of the month beginning Saturday, November 2nd, 10:00 AM--noon, and ending on Saturday, March 7th. 

Please try to come to the first class having read the introduction to the book. Copies of the book may be available in the church library as well as the public library. Please sign up HERE or contact me (Alice Diebel) directly at or 937-305-4694.

Centering: Navigating Race, Authenticity, and Power in Ministry
edited by Mitra Rahnema
October 2019--June 2020, 10:30 AM, in the Sanctuary
  Centering: Navigating Race, Authenticity, and Power in Ministry has been chosen by Rev. Kellie as our Congregational Read for this programming year. The book includes nine essays by different authors, each one a Unitarian Universalist religious professional of color. Each essay is followed by a response, also from a religious professional of color. This book centers the stories, analyses, and insight of Unitarian Universalists of color who are offering their professional religious leadership, and is a joint project of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers Association's Committee for Antiracism, Anti-oppression, and Multiculturalism and Skinner House Books (and it's  available through the UUA Bookstore, on Kindle, and Google eBooks).

We'll gather on the third Saturday morning of the month (except for October 26th and May 23rd) October, 2019 through June, 2020; for our first discussion was held on Saturday, October 26th; if you were unable to attend that session,  Rev. Kellie hopes you will still join us on Saturday, November 16th, 10:30 AM, in the Sanctuary.

If you have any questions, please contact Rev. Kellie at

Monday, November 25th, 7:00 PM, in the Founders' Room
This group offers a supportive place where cisgender congregants can work on reducing and eliminating their own internalized transphobia and heterosexism, without harming our transgender siblings. Meetings are usually scheduled for the 4th Mondays of each month, at 7:00 PM, in the Founders' Room.

Contact Rev. Kellie at with any questions or concerns.

Monday, November 18th, 7:00 PM, in the Founders' Room
The Social Action Committee meets on the third Monday of the month, 7:00 PM, at the Fellowship. On even-numbered months they gather in the Library, and on odd-numbered months they meet in the Founders' Room.
If social action issues are something you feel strongly about, why not consider joining them? The meetings are open to ALL.

Saturday, November 9th, 10:45 AM, 120 West Apple Street, in Dayton
Please join us on Saturday, November 9th, in helping to provide our long-standing second Saturday lunch  for women and families staying at the St. Vincent de Paul Shelter.   This is the second month of our "fall/winter" menu and our needs this month include servers,  hearty chili (at least one batch vegetarian) , chili fixings (shredded cheese and sour cream),  vegetable dishes (such as cooked fresh vegetables or medley), green salad, fresh fruit/fruit salads, 100% orange juice and 1% milk .   We need several donations of most items, with each donation serving 15-20 people. Please bring all items---heated if   applicable---to 120 West Apple Street (the St. Vincent de Paul Gateway Shelter) by 10:45 am.    

You can sign up for Saturday, November 9th lunch on the clipboard in the Gathering Space, or you can contact Lynn Buffington at  937-657-0426(call or text) or  You can also check on what is needed  at  SignUp Genius (no need to log in unless you also want to sign up through Genius). 
We expect St. Vincent's to  continue to be very full with about 120 in house, typical for fall and early winter. In October we fed 109, up from 103 in September.  There were 69 in the women's group at 11  and at least 40  in the family group at noon.

Thanks to the many who served  (in the photo) and/or provided food in October!

Saturday, November 9th
9:30 AM Coffee & Registration (doors open 9:15 AM)
10:00 AM - 4:00 PM:  keynote, lunch, workshops & annual meeting
Methodist Theological School in Ohio (MTSO), Delawaremap

  • Featuring the Rev. Dr. Jack Sullivan, Executive Director, Ohio Council of Churches
  • Morning worship offered by UU seminary students form MTSO
  • Workshops on Transgender Justice, Immigration, Gerrymandering, Poverty, and ad discussion of Those Things that Continue to Divide Us.
  • Time for deeper on the Keynote
  • Lunch provided by MTSO's excellent farm-to-table program and includes vegan, vegetarian and omnivore options. 
  • Business Meeting where we will elect new UUJO Board Members, approve the budget and vote on important changes to our bylaws to strengthen our work for justice in Ohio.
  • Childcare is provided but you must register by October 27th.
  • REGISTER Today by clicking  HERE!


One Last Thing... 



You can keep up-to-date with all the happenings at MVUUF by viewing the Fellowship's online calendar right HERE.


The calendar is updated throughout the week, so it's ALWAYS the place to check & see what's going on at MVUUF; usually, it's quite A LOT!



We are a liberal religious community that embraces diversity and respects the inherent worth and dignity of every person.  ALL are welcome here, no matter their race, class background, sex, sexual/affectional orientation, gender expression, or ability.


Please visit us on Sunday mornings at 11 a.m. for our worship service---

we'd love to see you!