by Mike Clawson

I just finished my own Rites of Passage.

It seems strange to say, since I’ve already been working as the administrator for Illuman since last November. For months, I’ve gotten the bird’s-eye view of this organization, but it wasn’t until recently, at the (first-ever!) New Jersey MROP, that I got to experience first-hand the unique and transformative inner work that Illuman facilitates.

I was, frankly, stunned at the impact it had on me. Though I’ve had powerful experiences at similar events in the past, I went into the MROP distracted by life concerns back home and lacking a specific focus. But on the second day, during one of the rituals, I was struck with a sudden clarity about the inner work I was there to do. Over the next few days, I was able to let go of old griefs and versions of my past self that no longer served me.

If you’ve completed your own rites of passage, perhaps you know what I’m talking about. Do you remember how it felt to express your pain, grief, and joy in embodied ways? Do you recall the raw, refreshing, and terrifying vulnerability you felt when meeting with your Council circle? Maybe it was the first time you had ever experienced that kind of safety around other men. Or perhaps your keenest memory is the opportunity to reconnect with the “more than human world”—sitting and listening intently, purposefully, to the trees, the animals, the wind, and the rain… and to the whisper of Spirit within our own souls.

I wonder if your rites shifted something within you as they did for me. Did they unlock tender things that you had been keeping buried and hidden? Did they help you let go of a past or false self that no longer served you? Did they inspire you to live differently when you got home? To spend more time outdoors? To stay connected with other initiated men? To seek reconciliation in broken or wounded relationships? To live more intentionally and reflectively? To practice self-compassion more often? To make time for silence?

Of course, as our Weaver told us at the end of our week, the rites are just a beginning. We graduated from Kindergarten, but there’s still so much to learn. I’m taking time to let my lessons from the MROP settle in, and I’m finding ways to keep doing the work in an ongoing way. Just tonight, I will be meeting again virtually with my Council brothers from the MROP. And there’s a local Council group where I live that I hope to plug into as well.

If you haven’t done a rite of passage yet, what’s getting in the way? (That’s an honest question. We all have many pressing demands in our life, and yet it can be important to clear space to focus on our inner lives as well.) We still have three more MROPs coming up this year in the United States—in Illinois, Northern California, and Texas (including a concurrent Umbrales rites for Spanish-speakers)—not to mention MROPs in Austria, Scotland, and Latvia. Or, if you’re between the ages of 19-29 (or know someone who is), check out the Young Men’s Rites of Passage coming up in Minnesota. You will come away changed for the better. As one man observed toward the end of my own rites, “the world needs more of this.”

If you are already an initiated man, consider attending an Initiator Program that runs concurrently during the MROP. It’s an opportunity both to revisit and refresh yourself on what you discovered during your first rites, and then to go even deeper. I’m already excited to go back myself!

Whether initiated or not, you’re also welcome to plug in to a Council circle. We have dozens of local groups across the US and around the world, as well as opportunities to meet in virtual Council every week of the year. We’d love to see you there.

Whether your own rites were last month, last year, a decade ago, or still yet to come, I invite you to join us on the Journey of Illumination to which they point—a journey that challenges us to show up, pay attention, move past our routines, and embrace an intense, abundant, and truly authentic spiritual life.

I’ll see you on the journey!

Illuman Administrator

As the shape of my inner work has slowly started to evolve, I’ve found myself reflecting more and more on my relationship with my father and the important male figures in my life. As my yearning to explore the spiritual and emotional experience of fatherhood deepened, I began researching books, articles, and resources to guide me in my pursuit of a more peaceful and positive approach to parenting. As scripture reminds us, “Seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you” (Matthew 7:7). My seeking led to finding, and one of the amazing gifts that I found (or rather, that found me!) was the Father for Generation Alpha program.

As a soon-to-be father, I am incredibly grateful for the opportunity to do in community what I was desiring and already planning to do on my own. Fatherhood is a rite of passage and, like all rites of passage, it is not meant to be done alone. Through prayer and perspective, I am now beginning to wonder if perhaps the “delaying of fatherhood” that so many men in my generation are experiencing might actually be a unique opportunity. Could it be that life and grace are providing us with an opportunity to become more conscious and compassionate men before becoming fathers? Is it a stretch to imagine that perhaps it was necessary for 100 years to pass in order for Abraham to be transformed into the father of faith? If we are to succeed in building a world marked by greater compassion and radical kinship, then we must seize the opportunity to walk with more fathers and soon-to-be fathers as they seek to heal the intergenerational wounds that perpetuate violence and inhibit intimacy between fathers and their children. Cohorts like A Father for Generation Alpha can help us do just that. 

Back in March, we offered you an opportunity to support Illuman brothers in the Czech Republic who are caring for refugees from the war in Ukraine. For the past several months these brothers have provided food, housing, medical and mental health care, and other forms of assistance for almost fifty Ukrainians, mostly women and children, at their monastery in Prague. We are grateful to say that, to date, your generosity has enabled us to send almost $7,000 to support their work. Thank you so much for responding to this urgent need!

Soularize, our annual conference on men’s spirituality and healthy masculinity, will be returning in person this November 3–6, 2022 to Hotel Tamaya, just north of Albuquerque, New Mexico. This event is open to any and all male-identified persons, and is a great way to reconnect with old friends or discover Illuman for the first time. Mark your calendars now. More details to follow.

Illuman’s signature event, this 5-day, 4-night experience awakens men to the adventure and mystery of their own masculinity, their deep spirituality, their potential for leadership, and their life’s purpose. Follow the links below to learn more about the one nearest you.

October 5–9

October 19–23

Thursday, June 2, 7–9 pm EDT

In this first Watering Hole session of 2022, Fr. Jim Clarke, Illuman Wisdom Elder and author of Creating Rituals: A New Way of Healing for Everyday Life, will discuss how to create personal, family, and communal rituals that will change your life. This online talk will last one hour, followed by Q&A and small group Councils.

This summer retreat hosted by Illuman of Minnesota will focus on being in a true relationship with ourselves, others, and the world around us. These teachings will be surrounded by time in council circles, experiencing ritual and wandering in the beautiful natural environment of Osprey Wilds. The retreat will be led by Okoyeagemon, co-founder of Antiracism Studies Dialogue Circles with Margery Otto JD and current Executive Director of ASDIC Metamorphosis.

Designed to meet new dads at a moment when life has initiated them into fatherhood. Meetings are just one hour each week. If you are a new or soon-to-be dad, then this course is for you!

The Young Men’s Rites of Passage is 5 days and 4 nights of formal male initiation for men ages 19–29. The program is a deeply prayerful and soulful experience that builds on the classic patterns of male initiation through simple and moving rituals and teaching. During this event you will engage in ritual, drumming, council circles, elder talks, contemplative silence, and solo-wilderness time.

M.A.L.E. Anon is a fellowship of men who share their experience, strength, and hope to find spiritual solutions to their common problems, especially our culture’s addiction to patriarchy and toxic masculinity. It is open to all men of any description, any background. Anybody who identifies as a male is welcomed, including those in transition. We believe that the 12 Steps offer a blueprint for becoming better human beings and better men and that changed attitudes can aid recovery.

Illuman is an independent, non-profit 501(c)(3) organization whose vision is to see men transforming men and, through them, families and communities for generations to come. Our mission is to engage those seeking a life-long journey of spiritual transformation.