Pictorial Reflection on Parenting and Doctoring

"If you want to change the world, go home and love your family." -Mother Theresa

Being a mom makes me a better doctor and being a doctor oftentimes makes me a better mom. I like to think that I have the honor of changing the world in both spaces. - Kate Dielentheis, MD

Director's Corner

Families matter and families usually start with babies!



By Adina Kalet, MD, MPH



In honor of Mother’s Day, Dr. Kalet describes how the old tradition of all-but-ignoring women physicians’ pregnancies, childbirths, and parenting was neither right, good, nor effective in creating a health care culture of care and compassion. While things are getting better, it has taken too long, and there is still a ways to go ...

In the 1980s, no residency training program had a maternity or parenting leave policy. It was not until enactment of The Family and Medical Leave Act of 1993 that employers were required to provide job-protected—albeit unpaid—leave for qualified medical and family reasons. A pregnant resident was seen as a disaster and, at the minimum, a scheduling nightmare for the program leadership. Here are some stories from the bad old days. You might notice that some things haven’t changed as much as they should have.

Perspective/Opinion

Hope springs maternal: Finding strength as a physician single parent

By Lara India, MD

“Divorce is never a good thing, but sometimes it's a better thing.” This was perhaps the best condolence that I had received since breaking the news to my family, friends, residency classmates. Of course, all the platitudes in the world amounted to nothing as I sat at my computer and drafted a letter of resignation to my program director.



Despite my efforts to balance anesthesia training and caring for my then one-year-old son, my soon-to-be ex-husband's lawyer argued that my job made me an absent parent and he threatened my custody. Never mind that my lawyer assured me that this line of reasoning was unsound: overwhelmed by desperation – to put my child to bed in our home as many nights as possible, to regain some modicum of control over my life, to live in a world where a physician mother is celebrated for the opportunities she provides her child rather than demonized – I sat, late at night, in the dark, drafting an email in Microsoft Word. With the recent move and spate of unshared bills, internet service was a luxury I couldn’t afford. 

Perspective/Opinion

Creating a “zone of fabulousness” through collective care

By Stephanie Kellogg, PhD

Being a parent in any family structure has its rewards and challenges. Those who lead untraditional families have unique struggles to navigate and unique attributes to offer teams. In this piece, I want to provide a voice to the struggles and paint a picture for opportunities.

For most, having an untraditional family was not part of the plan. Yet that is where their path took them. A two-parent household with healthy, biological children and maybe a pet or two is no longer a reality. Getting to this point often included indescribable heartbreak and grief. Moving to acceptance and peace can bring a greater sense of purpose to one’s life. But what does it take to get there, especially when you identify as a parent and a professional?

Perspective/Opinion

Reflections on Mother’s Day: You become. 





By Adrienne Klement, MD

“You can’t have it all,…….. all at once,”

-Ruth Bader Ginsburg  

It was a hot July in Durham, North Carolina. I had just finished fellowship and was starting my new role as an Attending in a large Academic hospital when I had my first daughter. I planned for 6 weeks of maternity leave, thinking this would be “enough,” while my husband was on his Trauma rotation as a chief resident in Orthopedic Surgery. I went into labor on a Saturday night, and we decided that he would finish his call shift and work through the night, while I “slept” after my epidural was in place. Emma patiently waited for him to finish his 28-hour call shift. She even gave him a few hours of rest—on the bench by the window—before her arrival. (Ask any resident—we could sleep anywhere). The first few days of parenting were joyous and blissful. Then my husband went back to work, often leaving before 5 am and getting home well after 8 pm. Naively, I decided because I would be home with Emma, that he would plan his busiest rotations for July and August. Why would I need any help? 

Perspective/Opinion



The journey to a meaningful life

By Karen Marcdante, MD



At the end of a long career, Dr. Marcdante looks back on her journey toward meaning...

It may be cliché, but like many, I chose medicine because I wanted to help people and make a difference. In other words, I wanted a career where I mattered, adding value to the lives of patients and, in turn, being valued for doing so.

I believe that by focusing on mattering, I have created a meaningful life. But what is meaning? To get started, I did what any curious person would do today. I asked ChatGPT if a life inherently has meaning or if meaning was inferred after one’s life was lived. ChatGPT’s last paragraph in the answer: 

“Ultimately, whether life has an inherent meaning or not is a question that may never      be fully answered. However, what is certain is that individuals have the ability to create          meaning in their own lives, based on their values, beliefs, and experiences, and that the      meaning of life is a deeply personal and subjective matter.”  

In other words, meaning is a journey.

Perspective/Opinion

They believe her when she says, “I know it’s uncomfortable to have swollen ankles”

By Karen Herzog

A former journalist who became a mother on Mother’s Day weekend in 1995 reaches out to the OB-GYN who delivered her first baby and later was featured in a newspaper story. They pick up where that story left off with the OB-GYN still loving her job, and now a grandmother of 15… 

Mother’s Day weekend at my house is defined by birth days. Both our daughters were born Mother’s Day weekend – exactly two years and two days apart.

One literally backed into the world, unexpectedly breech, in the wee hours of the Friday morning of Mother’s Day weekend, while the other arrived like a tiny freight train two years later -- two weeks before her due date, and the day before Mother’s Day, as we were in the middle of packing to move to a new home.

You never forget the physicians and nurses who skillfully and compassionately guide you or a loved one through a difficult medical journey. The same is true for those who help bring your children into the world. They play central roles in the defining moments of becoming a parent.

The Kern Institute extends its congratulations to:



Iaong Vang, MCW-Milwaukee Student and Kern TI2 award winner for her receipt of the 2023 President’s Community Engagement Award