FOCUS: Parental Depression 

EDITION: October 2024

Dear Depression: Understanding The Disease and How It Impacts Our Kids

The kids I see in my office never cease to amaze me with their perspectives, ideas, thoughts, and feelings about the dynamics within their families—especially when they have a safe space to express themselves openly, generally alone with me. When children are given the chance to share, they offer a raw and honest look into the impact that something like depression can have on a household. 


Out of the mouths of babes, we hear the unfiltered truth about the emotional ripples that touch every corner of their lives, and the ways they are affected by the unseen but ever-present shadow of depression in their homes. 


Dear Depression,



I hate you. You took everything from me. You stole my dad and, with him, my whole childhood.


You snuck into our house like a thief, and all I remember is you dragging him into that dark room—the “dungeon.” That’s what it felt like, a place I was afraid of. 


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Next Up...

How to Talk to Your Parent About the Impact of Their Depression

Being a ‘kid’ isn’t just about age—it’s a role we never fully outgrow. We’re always our parents’ kids, no matter how old we get or how far we move away. Although we want to feel like adults living our own lives, more often than not, the second we walk back through our parents’ door, we morph back into the original family dynamics. A parent’s depression affects everyone, regardless of age. Our roles may shift over time, especially as our parents grow older, but the impact of depression doesn’t change—it ripples through the entire family. 


We all know the age-old tactic of shoving things under the family rug. You know, that lumpy rug where we stuff our issues, hoping they’ll magically disappear along with the memories. But from what I’ve seen, those issues don’t stay buried. I’ve worked with many adults who have tried desperately to hide childhood or family problems under that rug, only to find them resurfacing in their relationships—with partners, kids, co-workers, bosses, friends, siblings, and even strangers. The players may change, but the dynamics remain the same.



If you’re ready to face these issues head-on, here are some tips for approaching a parent or family member as an adult—if you’re brave enough to try. I also recommend working with a therapist to help guide you through this process.”


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Educating Kids on Depression

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Reflecting on How My Moods Affect My Children

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How Parents Can Minimize the Impact of Depression on Their Children: Strategies for Creating a Healthier Environment

READ THE ARTICLE

Overcoming Depression: Practical Strategies for Parents to Stay Engaged and Present with Their Children

READ THE ARTICLE

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BECKY RECOMMENDS THIS PODCAST:

The Hardcore Self Help Podcast with Duff the Psych


Your mental health is certainly your business. But sometimes, telling those close to you about your struggles can help them to stop misinterpreting your behavior and be a better support to you.


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Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.

I want each person I work with to know they do have a voice, and by becoming accountable, they can change their lives for the better.
CRT, CCDC, CACC
Life Coach & Counselor
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