Being a ‘kid’ isn’t just about age—it’s a role we never fully outgrow. We’re always our parents’ kids, no matter how old we get or how far we move away. Although we want to feel like adults living our own lives, more often than not, the second we walk back through our parents’ door, we morph back into the original family dynamics. A parent’s depression affects everyone, regardless of age. Our roles may shift over time, especially as our parents grow older, but the impact of depression doesn’t change—it ripples through the entire family.
We all know the age-old tactic of shoving things under the family rug. You know, that lumpy rug where we stuff our issues, hoping they’ll magically disappear along with the memories. But from what I’ve seen, those issues don’t stay buried. I’ve worked with many adults who have tried desperately to hide childhood or family problems under that rug, only to find them resurfacing in their relationships—with partners, kids, co-workers, bosses, friends, siblings, and even strangers. The players may change, but the dynamics remain the same.
If you’re ready to face these issues head-on, here are some tips for approaching a parent or family member as an adult—if you’re brave enough to try. I also recommend working with a therapist to help guide you through this process.”
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