Unwinding the Negative Thinking Spiral
By Ursula Clidiere, Ph.D., CBC and Peggy Marshall, Ph.D., CMBC
Few of us need reminding that 2020 was a year that represented a massive call to action on so many fronts, but first and foremost, for the helping professions. Additionally, it was a double whammy for many as it challenged most helpers in their capability and capacity, mentally and physically, to help others. It also presented us with our own needs for being helped, held, and supported.
For the Coaching profession, equally, it meant a period of stretching, learning, growth, further differentiation, research, and so much more. More importantly though, it probably made a few of us realize our own limitations in coaching others while trying to keep “all wheels on our own carriage”.
Why? Even though we were taking in mutual good advice, the good vibes, the tools, the reframing, … negativity at times creeps in like a snaky poison. Before stretching, we did learn more about our own failure than we probably ever wanted, before learning, it meant stumbling or falling. Nonetheless, as a profession we have also experienced a tremendous surge of peer support, learning opportunities (many free of charge!), networking, candor, and help. Yet, experiencing ourselves with a drop of anxiousness, and noticing what a drip of negativity can do to us, may have humbled us, and possibly broadened our own perspective, even filled us with more compassion.
Despite choosing the cloth of the Resilience Protective Factors discussed by Burger and Marshall Nine Protective Factors of Resilience (globalioc.com) to drape around us, the negativity-poison can penetrate through. Sometimes in small trickly doses that shows itself as an indistinct gray shadow that gives the day a bit of a washed-out appearance. At other times, it might come as a more tidal affront that was difficult to ignore, kidnapping thought processes, and requiring repeated centering before pushing the ‘you are now connected with video’ button on Zoom. The shapes, shades and the duration of these sensations vary greatly but on bad days, it was a trip down the negativity spiral and back. So, what propels us into the negative thinking spiral and more importantly, how do we get back out?
