Wednesday Weblog for November 10, 2021 |
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My Boston Marathon finisher's medal is now one of my most prized possessions. Recently I participated in a retreat as a volunteer board member, so I brought the medal because I knew some members in attendance wanted to see it and pat me on the back.
At dinner after the event, one of the board members asked to see it again, knew it was in my pocket and asked me to 'pull it out.' The restaurant happened to be silent just then, so that comment attracted the attention of a table of eight corporate diners close by, as well as others who turned to find out what 'it' was.
I was a little embarrassed.
But everyone insisted that I take it out of my pocket and display it. I did. That same board member shared that I had run my first marathon at 70 years old and I had the medal in my hand to prove it.
Everyone in the room clapped and cheered and smiled at me.
I felt elite.
In that special moment, I realized that one of the reasons I had trained so hard and dedicated myself to the marathon was that one of the greatest feelings in the world, not one that most get to feel very often, is to feel elite.
At a little restaurant in Hull, Massachusetts, late on a Friday night in November, almost a month after the race, I finally completed the puzzle of why I ran. The missing piece was that I ran to feel elite, and it felt good. And, I want to feel it again. Watch out, America.
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When my son was almost 2 years old, our family moved to Memphis, Tennessee, from the Los Angeles area and we lived there for a little over ten years so we had the full Memphis experience.
- We all, (as opposed to y'all) went to Elvis Presley’s Graceland about a dozen times and wrote our names on the wall outside more than once.
- We’ve had barbecue at the Rendezvous Restaurant. It is literally in a dark alley, underground, behind a dumpster, where the average waiter has more than 20 years of service and are as likely to tell you what you should order as take your order.
- More than once my wife and I had the chance to 'Catch the Blues at Lou's' an authentic southern blues club overlooking the Mississippi River just off of Beale Street.
- In a city without snowplows, except at the airport, I once paid an entrepreneurial truck driver $20 to ‘push’ me up a modest incline on my desperate way to the airport during the one unforgettable snowstorm. Imagine six inches of snow that is packed down by the cars, never plowed, and treated by sprinkling ashes on the road after it snows.
- We ate catfish regularly, including of course, as Easter dinner at a friend’s house our first year in town.
- For the most part we loved living there. It was slow paced, inexpensive, easy to get around. Our townhouse on a small lake was the perfect place for our son to grow up within walking distance of the elementary school.
- Oh yeah, and my son and I won a Father’s Day ‘father-son’ golf tournament on a course on the campus of the old Holiday Inn University in Olive Branch, Mississippi in a most unusual manner, for a most unusual reason.
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Memphis in May International Festival Site |
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Growing Up. When Joe was 3 years old, as part of a plan to help him reach his potential, I took up golf so I would be able to play with him when he was older. As a youngster, he was able to walk in a limited manner. Not for long distances and not exactly gracefully, but he could still walk. He didn’t use a walker in grade school and didn’t use a wheelchair until junior high, as a result of major spine surgery.
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So, we were excited when a new golf driving range opened up just across the state line in Mississippi, about ten minutes away. We’d head down there and take turns whacking away at a basket of balls for an hour or so, and then head to the clubhouse for a root beer and some video games or skeeball. We were probably one of the best customers, and of course, everyone knew our names.
Clare, the sister of the owner, worked there most nights, and the place was open year-round. There were times Joe and I were the only customers and we’d hang out after using the driving range and play pinball or other games. I think we had a frequent bucket card or something. We eventually got to know the owner's whole family, and in fact, Joe had one of his birthday parties there: a good time for all the kids and parents, especially the Dads, if you know what I mean.
Holiday Inn was founded in Memphis and their ‘University’ where hotel managers were trained was located about 15 minutes away in Mississippi and had a great (I mean easy) golf course, in addition to a hotel and conference center. When I played golf for real, which wasn’t very often, it was most likely at this course. (Renamed Whispering Woods and now closed).
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One year I saw a poster touting a Father’s Day Golf Tournament, a father and son event, where team members would alternate shots for 18 holes. Perfect for my son and me. A great time to be with the ‘guys’ and be together. To make things even and more interesting, a double-blind bogy handicapping system would be used. |
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Non-Golfers: Attention
Please ask a golfer you know for a better explanation than what follows. It is hard to explain if you don't golf.
Definition Section
Golf Handicap: Wikipedia says “A golf handicap is a numerical measure of a golfer's potential that is used to enable players of varying abilities to compete against one another. Better players are those with the lowest handicaps."
If your golf handicap is 25, and mine is 20, at the end of the round, we subtract those numbers from our scores to get the ‘net’ score. This is important for frequent golfers and the occasional person who bets on the golf course, something I have never done. Well.
In handicap stroke play competitions, a golfer's playing handicap is subtracted from the total number of strokes taken to produce a net score, which is then used to determine the final results.
Blind Bogey Handicap Net Score:
I had never heard of this type of system and here is an explanation from the internet:
The blind bogey holes are checked, and strokes over par on those holes are totaled. That total is then doubled. That is the golfer's blind bogey handicap allowance. That allowance is then subtracted from the golfer's gross score, the result of which is his blind bogey handicap net score.
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In other words:
In a tournament using this system, holes are chosen at random and scores on those holes are subtracted from the total so that golfers of unequal skill can compete. The worse the golfer, the higher the blind bogey golf handicap and the lower the net score.
So, for this event, the final scores would be whatever was shot, minus this blind bogey golf handicap, to level the playing field or level the greens, whichever you prefer.
When we showed up for the event, we were excited to learn the owner of the driving range and his son, about 18 years old, would be in our foursome, and we set off.
Their cart kept score, and after each hole, we’d announce what we shot and so would they. After only a few holes, my son became suspicious about how they were counting, and so I started paying closer attention.
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Sure enough, they must have flunked math when they were in school, because the 7’s and 8’s and 9’s were becoming 5’s and 6’s and 7’s on a regular basis. My son asked if we could keep score the way the other golf cart was keeping score, and I told him that we’d play it straight and track our actual performance.
We might be bad, but we would be accurate. It wasn't worth it to fudge the numbers. (Quick note: I am the nerd who gives back change when the cashier has given me too much.)
I know there are readers out there who use the scorekeeping method members of our foursome used. My understanding is that it is pretty popular method, even used by a former President, to tally scores. I don't golf anymore, so I wouldn't know.
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To be honest with you, I felt bad when we put down a couple of 12’s and at least one 14, because it was mildly embarrassing. But we weren’t there to impress, we were there to share Father’s Day on a beautiful course together.
We finished the 18 holes, shook hands all around, and went to enjoy the post round barbecue behind the clubhouse. Barbecue in the south is like lobster in Maine, crabs in Maryland, blackened red snapper in Louisiana, tacos in California or Pizza in New York: they do it right.
It took quite a while for the tournament managers to calculate the scores of the 100+ golfers, since they had to select the holes for calculating the handicaps, then apply them to the scores and tally it up.
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We were minding our own business when fourth, third and second place teams were announced. And then they announced the winners of the entire event as 'Joe and Ed Doherty from Memphis.'
We looked at each other in surprise, got up from the picnic table and proudly received the biggest freakin trophy I had ever seen.
The trophy was awarded to us because in the double blind bogey system, we didn’t cheat and that actually helped us. Our ‘bad’ holes that were accurately recorded, ended up being subtracted from our overall score as our golf handicap and gave us the lowest net score.
Moral of the story:
When we got back to our house and took this photo, we both knew that without the double-blind bogey golf handicap system, someone else would have won the trophy. But the purpose of the system was to create an equitable playing field so everyone had a chance to win. It worked. We did.
We also knew that playing the game honestly contributed to us earning the trophy. We will never know if we were the only golfers that day recording every stroke, but what we have always known is that by recording every stroke, and playing the game right, we won. It worked. We were not just walkin' in Memphis. But walkin' tall in Memphis.
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Surprise Photo at the End |
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Joe's Positive Post of the Week |
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The Roll Call of states and countries where readers reside: Arizona, California, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New York, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Puerto Rico, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Vermont, Virginia, Washington and Washington DC, Wisconsin plus Canada, Spain, Conch Republic, Australia and the United Kingdom |
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Ed Doherty
774-479-8831
www.ambroselanden.com
ed-doherty@outlook.com
Forgive any typos please.
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