 |  | When Pharaoh receives word that Yosef and his brothers have been reunited, he is elated, as it says, “The news was heard in Pharaoh’s palace, saying, ‘Yosef’s brothers have come!’ And it was pleasing in the eyes of Pharaoh and in the eyes of his servants” (Bereshit 45:16). Why was Pharaoh so glad to hear that Yosef’s family arrived in Egypt? According to the Ramban, “Yosef told Pharaoh that he had honorable brothers in the land of the Hebrews…For it was a disgrace to [the Egyptians] to be ruled by a stranger, a servant…and now when his honorable brothers came to him, and it became known that Yosef was worthy to stand before kings, they all rejoiced in the matter.” In other words, Yosef’s standing in Egyptian society was tolerated but never fully accepted. Despite all of the good he had done for Egypt and the tremendous power he wielded, Yosef was nevertheless perceived by Egyptian society, especially the nobility, as an outsider whose prisoner-slave stigma never completely dissipated. Indeed, while Yosef was viewed as the mastermind behind Egypt’s prosperity during the famine, he was also seen as something of a burden to Egypt, as they felt they had to be ruled by a man of such low degree. Now, however, when Pharaoh heard that Yosef belonged to “Hebrew nobility,” he was overjoyed, because finally, Egypt could remove the stigma surrounding Yosef and claim that their viceroy is a man of distinguished birth. That is to say, with the coming of his brothers, Egypt could fully embrace Yosef.
The Sforno, however, tackles Pharaoh’s contentment at hearing the news of the family reunion from a slightly different angle. According to the Sforno, Pharaoh was aware that Yosef perceived himself as an outsider in Egypt. As a result, Pharaoh could see that Yosef never really gave “everything he had” to the country – he was always holding something back, always appearing aloof, anxious and reticent around others. Pharaoh needed Yosef to be fully invested in Egypt’s welfare, and so when he heard that his prized viceroy’s family had come, “He reasoned that if Yosef’s family settled there, he could have more of a stake in the country’s welfare and would perform his duties more diligently.” In other words, Pharaoh understood that Yosef never truly felt at home in Egypt. Now that his family could be with him, though, he would finally be at ease, gain confidence, gain a sense of belonging and bring his whole self to his work. Thus, the news gladdened Pharaoh not because Egypt could now fully embrace Yosef, but because now Yosef could fully embrace Egypt.
While it is true, Yosef’s staunch clinging to his Jewish identity is lauded by our tradition, so much so that the Exodus could not have happened without it, nevertheless, Pharaoh’s insight, at least according to the Sforno, illustrates an important lesson: We cannot fully be ourselves, we cannot fully give of ourselves unless we feel the support and presence of those we love most. In order for Yosef to effectively do his important work, he had to feel like he belonged, and Pharaoh knew that with the coming of his family, Yosef could find his natural, rightful place at long last.
This Shabbat, let us reflect on the idea that being with those we love most helps us be ourselves, give of ourselves and accomplish our goals. It is never easy feeling like we have to “go it alone.” We always lose or withhold something in that lonely process. Thus, surrounding ourselves with those who have our best interests at heart, whose values we share and whose love we can depend upon will never fail to enable us to do our best, be our best and achieve our missions. May we always feel the presence of our closest relations near to us, and may we lean on those loving shoulders to help us get through hard times, attain our aspirations and express ourselves in the truest of ways.
Shabbat Shalom!
-Rabbi Dan
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