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A new, monthly addition for our team of relationship experts: covering important topics, information, and answering common questions about romantic relationships.
This month’s question is:
I scheduled my first couples therapy appointment, what can I expect?
First, we want to congratulate you on taking the first step! Way to invest in your relationship health!! For most initial couples therapy appointments, the focus is on assessment and relationship building. Your couples therapist will likely spend most of the appointment getting to know you and your partner and learning more about what you hope to work on. We can’t speak for all couples therapists, but at MFS we believe that effective couples therapy begins with a thoughtful assessment process. Here’s an overview of what you can expect during the first four appointments with one of our relationship therapists:
Session 1: You and your partner(s) will meet with a provider to discuss your relationship history, your relationship strengths & concerns, how you each manage conflict, and what you hope to accomplish in relationship therapy. You will be asked to complete questionnaires about your relationship.
Session 2 & 3: Each relationship partner will meet individually with the relationship therapist to review your questionnaires, discuss any safety, trust, & commitment concerns, and briefly review your individual history.
Session 4: All partners meet with the relationship therapist for a treatment planning session to determine the treatment approach that is the right fit for your needs. At MFS, we take an evidence-based approach to relationship therapy and tailor treatment to the unique couple we are working with.
After the assessment phase, sessions will involve all partners together. If you or your relationship therapist believe that any partner may benefit from individual treatment, they may refer you to a separate provider for individual support. Following the assessment, if it is determined that couples therapy can effectively address your needs, treatment can begin. If couples therapy isn't the appropriate choice, we will make sure to connect you to a more appropriate service (e.g., discernment therapy, individual treatment, etc.)
We believe that relationship therapy should provide a safe and supportive environment where ALL partners can openly communicate, explore underlying issues, and work towards positive change. This means our relationship therapists work collaboratively to support the relationship, not just one partner. Our providers do not take sides or act as a referee during conflict. You can think of our relationship providers as more of a relationship coach who is there to cheer you on and give you feedback in areas where you can grow, so that the entire team wins.
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