Are you someone's mother or father?
Recently I was chatting with a friend about
of being a parent.
Me, I'm not a parent, but I can imagine several benefits.
Are YOU a parent? What would you say is the greatest
benefit we get from raising children?
High on my list is the idea that raising children
deep person-to-person skills.
For example, I'm noticing that most people who
tend to treat
others kindly and
They've learned valuable lessons of kindness,
generosity, compassion, patience, humility,
gratitude, and the capacity for loving.
You know, all those good commandments found
in all the world's holy books. Those universal
person-to-person skills that make us civilized.
I'd say these skills we learn as parents are the key
to living successfully anytime, everywhere.
But why am I talking about raising children?
How? The heart of the answer is this: all these
skills for success are about our
About relying on our emotions to get through
It's not, as I once suspected, about relying on our
great intellect to navigate life's up and downs.
Most experts agree that people usually make
decisions based on emotions. And afterward
we use our logic to justify these decisions.
You'll find examples everywhere you turn.
And you do it yourself all the time, too:
- What should I plan for dinner tonight?
- What shoes should I wear today?
- Why should you believe what I'm saying?
Examine each choice we make. Nearly every time,
you'll find we make a decision based on our feelings.
And then we come up with an explanation that seems
logical enough to justify our decision.
It's not our fault. Like it or not, this is how we work:
Heart first, then brains.
So here's that Tip I promised you:
The secret for planning music at any celebration
is to target the FEELINGS behind the celebration.
And raising children can give us the skills
to target those feelings effectively.
Well, of course it's NOT the complete story.
For important decisions, I still believe we need
to guide our choices with some expert advice,
as well as with our emotions.
Let's say you're organizing a special project.
You want to work with some capable people,
eager to make your dreams come true, right?
Inevitably, you'll make your plans based on your
feelings. We all know to expect that by now.
But don't jump in with your feelings alone.
Be smart and gather some expert opinions
to back up your feelings. Ask a pro.
Wherever you can, get advice from experienced
professionals, who've "been there, done that".
So, for example, t
he next time
you're planning music
-- for a
or a party --
you can call me.