You're Being Stalked...
But You Can Do Something About It
Ki Teitze (When you go out)
Is someone following you? I'll bet you're being followed. Let's explore what happens Ki Teitze, "When you go out"
When a man takes a new wife, he shall not go out with the army nor be charged with any duty; he shall be free at home one year and
shall give happiness to his wife
whom he has taken. (Dt 24:5)
The Torah prioritizes a new wife's happiness above even military service. For 365 days after "I do," a husband's To Do list looks like this every day:
1. Learn how to make my wife happy and give her joy.
2. Everything else.
No, it's not the impossible commandment! It's just a difficult one to learn, which is why a new husband repeats the lesson 365 days in a row. Ironically, learning how to make his wife happy is learning how to make himself happy, even when it feels as though he has to make himself unhappy in order to make her happy! I'll give you a moment. That's a tough one.
People who scrupulously read food labels to keep kosher or carefully observe the feasts frequently overlook this commandment, but it's not too late. You couldn't undo all the years you ate bacon or hung the Christmas lights on the tree, but you started where and when you understood. Are you just now discovering this commandment? Well...
Ephesians says that a husband loves his wife like he loves his own body. They are one flesh, so he must seek her pleasure, for his wife is the other half of his happiness. She also gives him favor by opening up Heaven's favor:
He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD. (Pr 18:22)
, in Hebrew, means to draw out or actively promote. A husband who cultivates the good in his wife has a reserve of favor and good will just waiting to be released from Heaven.
A good wife promotes her husband's cause in Heavenly places; she is a power booster for his prayers, praises, and petitions! She is the key that opens the hidden treasures concealed for a Godly man in Heaven.
Because devoting his life to her happiness will likely improve his humility, and Adonai draws near to the humble, any Godly, sacrificial suffering a husband does for his wife draws Heaven nearer to him...and their marriage...and their children...and their grandchildren...
The People of Israel are set apart by how wives are valued and loved. A man who finds a wife finds a "good thing." It is as though he has found the joy of the original Creation, like Adam, who exclaimed "flesh of my flesh, bone of my bone!" Adam was extremely impressed with himself, the female side of his unity.
If you want to evaluate a man's character or his ministry, observe how he treats his wife. Period.
This "Happy Year" will help young men with control and pride issues from the outset. He must still commit to the happiness of her day regardless of whether she's met his expectations and demands. This is
love, which is still unnatural to the soul just beginning to attach to another
. For all its life, that soul has thought itself independent and whole, but now it feels the trimming necessary to join it to another so that the two heal together to form one holy soul. It prepares a man for the often thankless service of tending the Bride and Body of Messiah.
The Happy Year is special time for husbands and wives to learn the importance of directing their God-given physiological desire toward their spouses. Unlike beasts who procreate to fulfill the primal instinct to reproduce, human beings communicate so that each partner is fulfilled and happy regardless of whether conception takes place.
A husband must become a giver before he can be a receiver.
To learn how to please his wife, the husband must use the power of speech. This is what distinguishes him from a beast. He is a speaking soul, and kind words, authentic questions, and responsiveness will draw her to him.
A good guideline is to speak kindly or give a compliment before you touch. Speaking souls are more likely to be intimate in spirit, soul, and body.
What if the marriage turns sour?
If any man takes a wife and goes in to her and then
and charges her with shameful deeds and
defames her, and says, 'I took this woman, but when I came near her, I did not find her a virgin
then the girl's father and her mother shall take and bring out the evidence of the girl's virginity to the elders of the city at the gate.
The girl's father shall say to the elders, 'I gave my daughter to this man for a wife, but he
and behold, he has charged her with shameful deeds, saying, 'I did not find your daughter a virgin
is the evidence of my daughter's virginity.' And they shall spread the garment before the elders of the city.
the elders of that city shall take the man and chastise him,
they shall fine him a hundred shekels of silver and give it to the girl's father, because he
defamed a virgin of Israel. And she shall remain his wife; he cannot
her all his days
. (Nu 22:13-19)
Defamation of one's wife incurs 40 (39) lashes and a heavy fine. He loses the power of initiating a divorce, a power normally awarded to the husband. The wife, however, has recourse under Jewish law to be free from this husband. If he had real suspicions, he would have summoned witnesses or invoked the trial of the sotah so that she could have her good name cleared. "Spread the garment" in Jewish law is to present testimony before the court on the accused girl's behalf, not merely to present a stained piece of cloth, which could have been altered. It requires two or three witnesses to establish a fact, and the husband could not present them; he could only ruin her family's reputation.
Why did the husband turn against his wife and begin to defame her publicly? Within the Torah portion is an embedded principle that is recorded in Pirkei Avot. Sin or obedience
start small, with seemingly insignificant things.
Run to perform even a minor mitzvah, and flee from sin; for mitzvah
another mitzvah; and one sin
another sin; for the reward of a mitzvah is a mitzvah, and the reward of sin is a sin. (4.2)
What if the rebellious son early in the Torah portion is not curbed? He could end up as the later one hung from the tree, killing himself with a capital sin. What if a husband does not attach to his wife sacrificially in the first year? He could end up hating and defaming her publicly, killing his own reputation. Sins "drag," or lead to bigger sins. Yes, life is a drag either for good or bad.
Obedience, however, can drag more obedience behind us. Pirkei Avot reads: (
4.1) Who is honored? He who honors others, as it is said: for those who honor Me I will honor, and those who scorn Me shall be degraded (1 Sa 2:30) In Ki Teitze, you can drag obedience to commandments behind you "when you go out."
Do not shame debtors, the poor, your spouse, or the employee, etc. Ultimately, the end of dragging all this obedient behavior leads to inheriting the Land of Israel in the portion's final verses, or enjoying the fruits of crops, vineyards, livestock, or even one's marriage.
Imagine all these good deeds trailing after you! Alternatively, imagine dragging around the fruits of sin all day, and as sin is added to sin, imagine how many little sin minions will be stalking you. Obedience to commandments is stalked by more more opportunities to do good. Disobedience to commandments ensures that one will be stalked by increasing numbers of sins.
The Father takes pleasure in rewarding good behavior (and please don't confuse this with salvation-these are two separate topics) in His children. What an opportunity we have! Every day we can do things that make the Father happy. Yes, we have "happy power" in us to cheer up our Father because He loves to reward us. His rewards may be awarded in this life, but mostly they are held in trust for the next life:
Here is the perseverance of the saints who keep the commandments of God and their faith in Jesus.
And I heard a voice from heaven, saying, "Write, 'Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on!'" "Yes," says the Spirit, "so that they may rest from their labors, for their deeds follow with them." (Re 14:12-13)
Yes, your commandments will stalk you all the way to the Kingdom of Heaven! You can't shake them for all eternity! And what a strange statement: "Blessed are the dead who die..." It is only those who live sacrificial lives who die while they live so that when they physically die their good deeds that cost them so much now follow along. The happiness we thought we forfeited for the Kingdom was the best thing we could done for ourselves. Likewise, a husband who loves his Godly wife sacrificially will find that good things "follow with" him both in this life and the next.
What advice can we give our sons so that they do not end up like the rebellious on of the Torah portion? Paul has a few tips:
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? Or
what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said
I WILL DWELL IN THEM AND WALK AMONG THEM; AND I WILL BE THEIR GOD, AND THEY SHALL BE MY
, COME OUT FROM THEIR MIDST AND BE SEPARATE," says the
DO NOT TOUCH WHAT IS
I will welcome
I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to Me
the Lord Almighty
. (2 Co 6:14-18)
Dt. 23:2-9 defines unequal yoking of an Israelite to one from another nation. To "enter the congregation of YHVH" is to marry into Israel. The number of generations defines the degree to which a (male) Ammonite, Moabite, Egyptian, Edomite, etc. may marry a native-born Israelite. The text does see conversion (full acceptance of the Torah) as a requirement for "entering in" the congregation, for it unifies the husband and wife.
An interim potential convert would observe certain prohibitions, such as rejecting idolatry, but could eat a torn carcass. Presumably those from nations not listed could marry in faster if they accepted the yoke of the covenant.
Ki Teitze addresses unequal bonding or yoking:
You shall not sow your vineyard with two kinds of seed, or
the produce of the seed which you have sown and the increase of the vineyard will become
shall not plow with an ox and a donkey
shall not wear a material mixed of wool and linen
Notice the next verses...
any man takes a wife and goes in to her and then
charges her with shameful deeds and
Unequal yoking and bonding begin with small compromises, especially in matters of convenience, but obedience stalks obedience, compromise stalks compromise, and sin stalks sin. If we compromise in the smaller things, it becomes easier to compromise in the things that can change the whole direction of our lives, such as marrying an unbeliever or one who is not fully committed to a sacrificial life of obedience to the Covenant of Israel.
Like the new husband learns to drag sacrificial love behind him for 365 days, so we can learn to drag sacrifice for the commandments of Adonai each day. Obedience will follow obedience. When we enter the Kingdom, just imagine how many wonderful commandments will be stalking you! Even if someone warned you about the 'ol ball-and-chain of the commandments (or marriage), Yeshua promised that they won't be heavy at all.
Choose your stalkers. They'll be with you forever.
READY TO CELEBRATE A FEAST IN ISRAEL? JOIN US FOR PASSOVER 2019
Passover at Tamar Park 2018
April 14 - 25 2019
$2,495 (airfare not included)
- Dinner (except April 24)
- National Park Passes
- Masada Lift
- Galilee Boat
- Bus transfer to and from Ben Gurion Airport
- All tips (except housekeeping)
- All meals at Biblical Tamar Park
- Flight/Trip insurance
- Airline Ticket
The Creation Gospel's choice of Biblical Tamar as a base for our tours, which celebrate both Passover and Tabernacles, is not random. Tamar is the southernmost boundary of Israel that will be established when the tribes are restored to their inheritance in the Messianic Age. Ezekiel 47 gives a beautiful description of the Arava desert as does Isaiah 35.
In the blossoming desert around Tamar, Israel takes a step home. There she will prepare each year by drinking from the river that flows from the Temple. The step-by-step journey begins among the nations of exile. What if other sheep hear Yeshua's voice and yearn to celebrate the biblical feasts in the Land of Israel, yet they have no pedigree in hand? It doesn't matter because....
Thus says the Lord GOD, "This shall be the boundary by which you shall divide the land for an inheritance among the twelve tribes of Israel...the south shall extend from Tamar as far as the waters of Meribath-kadesh, to the brook of Egypt and to the Great Sea.... You shall divide it by lot for an inheritance among yourselves and among the aliens who stay in your midst, who bring forth sons in your midst. And they shall be to you as the native-born among the sons of Israel; they shall be allotted an inheritance with you among the tribes of Israel." (Ezek 47)
Notably, Solomon used Tamar as a fortress to guard southern Israel and its trade routes. It was Solomon who first prayed for the nations who would turn toward the Holy Temple and pray. He asked that their requests and return be accepted by the Father. Blossoming Rose at Tamar is a wonderful step that connects both native-born Israel and the "strangers" who return.
At Passover, our tour will focus on the Biblical teaching of resurrection. We will study the process of death, burial, post-mortem experience, and two resurrections from Genesis to Revelation. Specific sites along the journey will offer the opportunities to stand on the ground where biblical events and prophecy of the nations will take place.
Are you coming?
To read the itinerary and register, go to
LAMALAH CHILDREN'S CENTRE
The LaMalah Children's Centre has received its Third Quarter funds, and all is well according to reports. We have some money toward a solar water heater, so if you'd like to contribute toward that or become a monthly donor, please visit our website at