Is there enough silence for the Word to be heard?
September 2016 (Vol. XXIX, No. 8)
Greetings Friends ~ How much of the turmoil seething all around us comes from masks put on to hide deep-seated fears-fear of losing control, fear of being discounted or abandoned, fear of difference, fear of not enough to go around, fear of change, fear of death? The insistent, brash voices that would stir up our fears, playing on our insecurities; and the unpredictable, violent actions of those that relish our terror-both feed on and corrupt our sense of vulnerability. Now is the time for courage, for honestly acknowledging our fears so that they can become bridges rather than walls. The fearful heart cannot engage; the anxieties that keep us awake at night close off the very oxygen we need to breathe. What if bringing our own fears out into the open could disarm the fear and anger coming our way from others? What if our vulnerabilities could teach us to overcome "fight or flight" with compassion? Finding a third way of standing fast against hate and injustice while loving our enemies brings us face to face with fear. How do we cultivate courage?
Dom Helder Camara by Linda DeGraf © 1983


The process of transforming fear isn't pretending that we have no fear, but embracing fear as a tool for learning and growth.

~ Kay Gilly in The Alchemy of Fear


Those who are willing to be vulnerable move among the mysteries.

~ Theodore Roethke. Read more: The Collected Poems of Theodore Roethke

What is this darkness? What is its name? Call it: an aptitude for sensitivity. Call it: a rich sensitivity which will make you whole. Call it: your potential for vulnerability.

~ Meister Eckhart. Read more: Meister Eckhart: A Mystic-Warrior for Our Times by Matthew Fox


We can never know what strengths and revelations might be on the other side of our fears until we face them and feel them all the way through. True positive thinking is the mental stance of surrender, simply trusting the process. We learn to accept what is.

~ from Awakening in Time by Jacqueline Small


If you pass through raging waters
in the sea, you shall not drown.
If you walk amid the burning flames, you shall not be harmed.
If you stand before the pow'r of hell and death is at your side,
know that I am with you through it all.

Be not afraid,
I go before you always.
Come follow me, and
I will give you rest.

~ lyrics from "Be Not Afraid" by John Michael Talbot. Read more: The Way of the Mystics: Ancient Wisdom for Experiencing God Today by John Michael Talbot, Steve Rabey


I will not die an unlived life. I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire. I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me, to make me less afraid, more accessible, to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise.

~ Dawna Markova. Read more: I Will Not Die an Unlived Life: Reclaiming Purpose and Passion


We become fearful of one another when our loving nature is blocked. Ignorance is at the root of all bigotry and injustice.

~ Kevin Ryerson in Spirit Communication: The Soul's Path


Beware the leader who bangs the drums of war in order to whip the citizenry into a patriotic fervor, for patriotism is indeed a double-edged sword. It both emboldens the blood just as it narrows the mind. And when the drums of war have reached a fever pitch and the blood boils with hate and the mind has closed the leader will have no need in seizing the rights of the citizenry. Rather, the citizenry, infused with fear and blinded by patriotism, will offer up all of their rights unto the leader and gladly so. How do I know? For this is what I have done. And I am Caesar.

~ WAR by Julius Caesar. Read more: The Gallic Wars by Julius Caesar


We live in a time when the greatest form of courage is to act as if our lives made a difference.

~ William Sullivan in The Secret of the Incas


Fear is such a powerful emotion for humans that when we allow it to take us over, it drives compassion right out of our hearts.

~ Thomas Aquinas. Read more: Thomas Aquinas: Selected Writings

from "Children Playing in the Snow under Plum Trees in Bloom" by Yoshu Chikanobu, The Met collection

A Japanese friend explained to me... " the plum [is] for courage because the plum puts forth blossoms while the snow is still on the ground."

~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh in Gift from the Sea

Hope is some extraordinary spiritual grace that God gives us to control our fears, not to oust them.

~ Vincent McNabb. Read more: From a Friar's Cell


A blessing of fear in these years is that it invites us to become the fullness of ourselves. It comes to us in the nighttime of the soul to tell us to rise to new selves in fresh and exciting ways-for our sake, of course, but for the sake of the rest of the world, as well.

~ Joan Chittister in The Gift of Years


At the bottom the only courage that is demanded of us is to have courage for the most strange, the most singular, and the most inexplicable that we may encounter. That humankind has in this sense been cowardly, has done life endless harm; the whole so-called "spirit-world," death, all those things that are so akin to us, have by daily parrying been so crowded out of life that the senses with which we could have grasped them are atrophied. To say nothing of God.

~ from Letters to a Young Poet by Rainer Maria Rilke


Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.

~ Anais Nin. Read more: The Diary of Anais Nin, Vol. 1: 1931-1934


It is as if God planted a great big kiss in the middle of our spirit and all the wounds, doubts, and guilt feelings were healed at the same moment. The experience of being loved by the Ultimate Mystery banishes every fear.

~ Thomas Keating. Read more: Open Mind, Open Heart 20th Anniversary Edition

Linda DeGraf © 2016


Let nothing disturb you;
Let nothing make you afraid;
All things pass;
Yet God is unchanging.
Patience
Is enough for everything.
You who have God
Lack nothing.
God alone is sufficient. ~ Teresa of Avila

~ Teresa of Avila. Read more: Interior Castle


The enemy is fear. We think it is hate; but it is really fear.

~ Gandhi. Read more: Gandhi: An Autobiography - The Story of My Experiments With Truth

Our word "courage" comes form the French word coeur, "heart." Courage is a willingness to act from the heart, to let your heart lead the way, not knowing what will be required of you next, and if you can do it.

~ Jean Shinoda Bolen in Gods in Everyman: Archetypes That Shape Men's Lives

Retreats at Friends of Silence

Celebrating 30 years of the Friends of Silence In 1987 

Nan Merrill began an urban contemplative community in Detroit and welcomed all to be linked in the Silence, in heart-prayer, and in friendship. The following year, to encourage this ever-widening community, Nan began this Letter, filled with inspirational quotes taken from things she was reading and had noted in her journal. She prayed over each and every issue, hand addressing the envelopes, and sending them with her love to what came to be hundreds of people worldwide. 

So, yes! In 2017 Friends of Silence is turning 30! 

Please help us celebrate this remarkable anniversary and moment of hope for the world. We know Nan would embrace this marking of both the history and the growing life of Friends of Silence. 

We are preserving all of the FOS Letters in an online searchable archive and database, publishing a contemplative, liturgical resource based on Nan's vision, and planning a fitting celebratory event. We will need your help! 

Save the date - October 21, 2017 and send us your memories and stories of Nan and how her life touched you. Those of you who were in correspondence with Nan (a marvelous letter writer) include copies, if you can. 

Look in our November appeal for a simple way to help us raise the funds for these anniversary initiatives. In the meantime, if you have an idea, a resource, or want to make a donation now, please send, ask, and do! Our address is on the mailer panel. 

Thriving on the Threshold: Becoming a Community of the New Story on October 21-23, 2016 at the Still Point Mountain Retreat near Harpers Ferry, WV.

The Gift of Story: A Retreat for Advent and the Winter Solstice on December 2-4, 2016 at Rolling Ridge Study Retreat near Harpers Ferry, WV.

Or schedule your own Personal Retreat. Friends of Silence is devoted to nurturing those who reverence silence, prayer, contemplation, the Divine Guest, and the Oneness of all creation. Personal retreat can be a wonderful discipline for those seeking the life-giving empowerment that derives from the Silence. We have partnered with Still Point Mountain Retreat to be able to offer space for personal retreat for our members, whether you come as an individual, couple, family, or small group. We also manage and offer River House. The wilderness setting of both these retreat spaces provides the quiet and solitude necessary for the ideal personal retreat experience.

More Retreats