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F.O.M.O. is a new acronym I just learned and one which two people in my family used on me lately - fear of missing out. I have had this affliction most of my life.
I want to be the first one at the event and the last one to leave. I dislike when things get canceled out of my control. I want to do all the activities I see others doing. I want to be invited places. And I don't want to sit home on new year's eve because, c'mon ... I just "know" everyone else is going out having a grand time and I will be missing something!!
True??? Will I be??? No.
When our New Year's eve plans were thwarted last week because our neighbors got ill, Hubs and I stayed home and did nothing. It was just "another day." He didn't care and maybe I am not as much fun as I used to be ... but I didn't push or force it either. I just ignored the fact that it was December 31st, the last day of a very blessed year (minus OCTOBER when my sister Paula died).
I think ringing in January 1 deserves a celebration ... and I definitely dislike doing nothing; it is unlike me to sit home. I usually make something happen. Or else ... what if I didn't? I suppose it makes me feel a tad boring, zero fun, and a bit older.
Again, that F.O.M.O. bug bit me in the butt.
What did I think I was actually missing by staying home? What was "out there" that I just had to go do? I don't like loud places and loud music, I don't like big crowds, and I drink maybe two cocktails and stop. I know many friends and family who stayed home.
Humans think automatically sometimes that it would be so much better "elsewhere" ... for instance:
- going out vs. staying in
- married to a different spouse
- that enticing job over there would be so much more exciting than our current one
- living-there-not-here
- doing-that-not-this
- having-this-item-now
- hanging-with-that-cool-person
... all is better.
Is it??
Snippeteers, why are some of us afflicted with F.O.M.O.? Who, what, where, why, and how do we think we're missing out exactly?? What is this ... envy? Jealousy? (Is it all in our heads?)
And does facebook and Instagram help us? It does not. It makes it oh-so-much worse. Oh-my-God, we are watching what everyone else is doing, eating, planning, going, drinking, hanging, traveling, wearing, spending ... and the fear of missing out only grows.
Envy is a mere waste of time. We must accept what we have ... not what we think we should have.
I am starting to get it now. Only took me 64 years and 32 years being married. There is nothing out there. Not a bigger party or a better partner or a more entertaining situation.
We might not want to try so hard to change what we have or what we're doing ... merely because of the fear of missing out. Plus, it's impossible to DO EVERYTHING anyway.
F.O.M.O. schwomo ... we're not missing out on a damn thing.
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