Ladies, do you ever feel sorry for men since they have to deal with us women? I do. I realize I drive Hubs crazy (and my brother - and my three sons).

Think about what men contend with concerning the female species: we tend to be emotional, whiny, catty, fickle, sensitive, colossal worry-warts, and are all-over-the-place in the thought process. We are complicated, use an exuberant amount of sentences to tell a story or make a point, tell men how to do things (since they are obviously doing them wrong), and spin around in circles like headless hens as we juggle no less than 17 details simultaneously.

Oh - and we never shut up.

Then The Cycle comes around 12 times a year, causing women to be unavailable for sex, eat all the chocolate, display mood swings, and reduce us to big buckets of hormones sprouting leaks.

And men are on the side dealing with all of this - and more - in their various roles:

As a brother … Oh my poor brother Danny had three opinionated younger sisters in the house while growing up. Sisters make it impossible for a guy to get into the bathroom, and when he's finally in, is forced to stare at icky things in the trash can and weird contraptions scattered around the counter, such as an eyelash curler and Midol. Brothers also witness sisters navigating Mom & Dad's strictness a tad easier - simply because they are girls - who get their way. How’s a brother to cope? (He’s actively looking in the classified for an available one-bedroom.)

As a boyfriend … Boy “friends” may have it the easiest since they are not legally locked in. As sobbing girlfriends dramatically present them with the radical ultimatum – ‘Marry me or else!’ – means the boyfriend can leave the premises and go home to sleep. Let her go berserk pacing the room worrying if he loves her or not - he's fresh out of daisies. He thinks he may never figure her out – and Dad is zero help because he is still figuring out Mom. How’s a boyfriend to cope? (This is where a night out with the guys is handy.)

As a father … Men must deal with Daddy’s Little Girl meandering through the dramatic pre-teens of changing bodies and pimply complexions. Daddy scoots out of the way lickety-split when a daughter runs past, wailing on her way to her bedroom to slam the door after a minuscule drama-induced upset at the dinner table. He doesn’t know exactly what to do with this little cretin he’s raising, and already feels sorry for the man she will marry. How’s a father to cope? (He feels a weekend-long fishing trip coming on.) 

As a husband … These guys may have it the worst - because the daughter eventually moves out, but the wife is here to stay. Husbands must gingerly handle Hormonal Henrietta through the years. After muddling through PMS, they side-step engorged bellies for nine months at a clip ... times that by four kids and that's three years of tip-toeing around moods and swollen ankles. FUN! How’s a husband to cope? (No wonder a game of golf takes so long.)

And it’s not over once the babies are born. Add postpartum to the process, and now hubby has to listen to more weeping and wailing. And then (poor guys), wives reach “mid-life” and become menopausal. But wait! First there's peri-menopause - a lighter version of whacky moods and a decrease in libido. Mary Menopause gets crazy toe-to-head hot flashes, so she flips on the ceiling fan, the portable fan, and bumps up the electric bill with constant air conditioning.

“Sybil” is in the house with 16 personalities, and hubby doesn’t know who will show up that morning - and whether she’s holding divorce papers or offering a steaming mug of coffee. Later, post-menopausal ladies might appreciate their husbands more - or - may simply tell them to go to hell in a hand basket because she’s come into herself, figured out things independently, and feels the need to be single ... bye-bye.

Being that this columnist is a woman, guilty of having driven her father, brother, husband, sons, and former boyfriends over-the-edge, she’s allowed to write this stuff in jest.

But seriously ladies - at our most absurd times - let's step back to look at ourselves as women from a man's perspective. Then laugh good and hard. We do seem RIDICULOUS to them.

So the next time you're acting like a deranged, unhinged, unbalanced, mad as a hatter female grating on a guy's nerves ... let's pause and feel sorry for men - for a minute.

• woMAN
• MENopause
• MENstrual cramps
• feMALE
• MRs.
• sHE
• MENtal breakdown
• HISterectomy (actually hysterectomy)
• GUYnecologist (actually gynecologist)

"How liberating and you are cleansing 'your' way. I want to do it before my only child has to. It will be difficult, as you know, but more difficult for him. Once again, you are my hero."

~ Blessings, Lesley G in Maryland

"It's true, to everything there is a season. I must say when we get to our age, there seems to be a need to get rid of stuff. I remember my mom telling us to come get what we wanted because she was cleaning out the basement. I swear people were sneaking stuff in when she wasn't looking because it took a very long time before she was 'done.' And still, when we went to clear out her house to sell it, there were so many things still there. I think it multiplies all by itself.

I hope to follow in your footsteps and liberate myself from things sooner rather than later. I am getting to the point where the emotional attachment to stuff has lessened. Thanks for the inspiration!!"

~ Cindy B in Maryland

"Never being short of money would liberate me. Money isn't everything but the lack thereof is tough, especially when one lives alone. This past year has been a tough one for me, especially when my youngest son went missing. We hired an organization to find him and he is now okay, so I am grateful for that. I only live in a small condo and that's tough enough as they are always raising the dues, etc. Enjoy your liberation. I think I have actually been liberated for a few years now." 

~ Happy Spring! Phyllis in Maryland

"Your column seemed as if it was written to me. I, too, have been doing a 'cleansing' and it feels great! Cleaning out the extra stuff and organizing the house has worked two-fold ... my heart feels less cluttered, too!

As I go through this decluttering, I realize how time is a blessing. Memories we think are held in much of this junk are the gifts of time actually held in our hearts through life’s journey. I am so thankful for this gift of time. How precious it is, how quickly it goes by and how wisely it should be used. I think this decluttering comes in many forms, and if we can strive for a bit more simplification, we might be surprised at how much clearer our paths in life becomes. Creating that space - whether in your home or in your heart - gives us the opportunity to use the wisdom we’ve gained through life to fill it with more important 'stuff.'

The important stuff for me, is in God’s whispers. Sometimes it is so soft and other times it's booming. It is much easier to hear Him when focus is placed on the right stuff. I’ve found it easier to hear the whispers when I’m less cluttered. The hardest step is the first one. Once I felt that sense of liberation, the path forward became much clearer and the anxiousness and uncertainties, though they will always exist, seemed to be almost sedated. It has been a much more peaceful journey as I’ve truly worked at removing the clutter and listening.

Your column was so timely and I thank you for sharing your thoughts with the snippeteers."

~ God bless you ... Happy Easter! Susan W in Massachusetts



could you sometimes just try to love

what you hate about yourself?