friend or phone?

friday.april.7.2023

not about the bike

friend or phone?

On a beach bike ride here in Florida, I passed eight young girls on spring break sitting on beach chairs. Not one of them was chatting with another, no one seemed to be enjoying each other, no two of them were laughing together. No one was swimming or playing with a beach ball or building a sand castle or dolphin watching or having fun. Nada. They weren't even snap-chatting silly pics of each other!

All eight girls were looking down at their not-so-smart phones. (Why did they bother to take vacation together only to ignore each other?)

Sometimes I wonder ... why we even bother to be with the people we are next to, if we (or they) are only more interested in talking with or texting the people on the other end of the phone? Texts, emails, Instagram chats, facebook likes, reading a news article - whatever - it distracts them.

Pick one - your friend or your phone?

Looking at our phones when we are supposed to be spending time with people is a 100% total distraction from the human beings in the room. In the car. At the party. In the restaurant. In a meeting.

(Challenge the people you're dining with ... the first to touch his/her cell phone has to pick up the tab.)

Have you ever noticed a couple eating together in a restaurant, yet they are ignoring each other because of their phones? (What is the point of going on a date?)

I have witnessed couples walking along the beach where one is yakking on the phone and the other is just ... well ... just hanging there with no one to chat with. (What's the point of taking a beautiful beach walk together?)

This is my new thing now ... when I am chatting face to face with a friend, and that person looks down at his/her phone - I stop talking. I refuse to compete for attention with an inanimate object. Especially because the second that person looks at her/his phone, I know they are no longer listening. They have checked out. We have ceased to be face to face. (More like my face to the crown of her head.)

If s/he is more interested in their (not-so-smart) phone than our time together ... conversation over. (Some realize I have ceased talking and politely stash away their phone; others fail to notice.)

I want to - and hope - I can offer the same phone courtesy to others. I want to choose friend over phone.

Snippeteers, we understand our addiction to cell phones - oh wowee - there is SO much happening on them! Yet when the action of studying your phone (for whatever reason) makes another person in the room feel ignored or invisible, ask yourself - is it really worth the Instagram posts you're scrolling, that funny video reel you're watching, or blatantly texting with another person besides conversing with the friend you are with?

Pick one - your friend or your phone?

snippeteer backtalk

hold your own

"Loved the hold your own snippet! Something I struggle with."

~ Dinah in Maryland

"Really related to this one. Every other week I meet on Zoom with our Italian teacher from Italy. I start by saying, "Ho dimenticato come parlare Italiano." (I forgot how to speak Italian) and then I swear I tune out, thinking, I don’t understand anything. Then they search for a word and I say it, surprising myself, as well as the other two. Now I can think instead of saying, "I can’t do this." I think I'm holding my own. So, mille grazie, cara! (a million thanks, dear!)

Then one day during ballet class, one person said she didn’t have flexibility and I said, "But you know the step - you can hold your own. Then a guy said he was trying, but not getting it, and I said, "No worries - you’re holding your own. Baci, cara (kisses, dear.) Great help."

~ Iris in Maryland

"Love my SNIPPETS."

~ Dianne in Maryland

"Amen to Hold Your Own. While it is good to recognize our weaknesses, areas for improvement, etc., it is also important to play to our strengths and acknowledge all the value-added talents and abilities we bring to life. Comparing ourselves to others just fuels insecurities and often makes us act in negative ways. As I age ("mature" - it's a process!!), I realize more and more that it is best to be true to yourself, be kind to others and just enjoy life!! Thanks for your words of inspiration."

~ Sandy in Maryland

"Thanks for the words of wisdom. I’m out here holding my own."

~ Holly in Maryland

prayer flares

FOR David dealing with a difficult relationship

FOR Gail’s parents now in assisted living

FOR Dominic on the loss of his mamma, Anna - age 90 - who died in Italia - and for Anna's soul

FOR Bobby taken off life support; and FOR his wife and 3 daughters

FOR preemie Baby Hudson to gain strength

FOR Sue as caregiver for her 90-year- old mamma wheelchair-bound, feeling quite burnt-out after six years

email your prayer flare

FOR Henry with Parkinson's Disease, not doing well, that he will experience God's unconditional love and loving presence

FOR Bob after a second cancer surgery this week, that he will feel God's healing

moral of the story ... shake off the dirt

One day a farmer’s donkey fell into a well. The animal cried loudly for hours, while the farmer tried to think of what to do to get him out. Finally, the farmer decided that it wasn't worth the trouble to try to pull out the heavy donkey so far down, since the donkey was very old. Since the well was dry anyway, he would just fill it in.

So he invited his neighbors to help. They grabbed shovels and began to toss dirt into the well.

The donkey, realizing what was happening, cried even louder. Then to everyone's surprise, he quieted after a few shovelfuls. When the farmer and villagers looked into the well, they were amazed at what they saw! With each shovelful of dirt being thrown on top of him, the donkey was doing something incredible - he was shaking off the dirt from his body and stepping on top of it.

Everyone watched the donkey get closer and closer to the top of the well, and when it reached the opening, it stepped over the rim and trotted away happily.

Life is going to throw dirt at you - all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the hole is to shake it off and use the dirt to your advantage to step up. Each problem we encounter can be a step up. We have the ability to get ourselves out of the deepest holes - if we don't give up.

Shake off the dirt ... be part of the solution, not the problem.