Dear Dr. Neimeyer,
I have read and appreciate your work about meaning reconstruction in loss.
I have a friend whose grief is so complicated and consuming that she can’t find life for herself (her husband died from cancer about six years ago) and she can’t seem to move forward at all.
Here is an excerpt from a text I received last week:
“I am afraid that I will never be emotionally stable ever again. My
personality and my ache for Michael hold me in this state. It is hard to
reconcile how life moves on in light of these two things–who I am, and how I feel about his death. In some sense I have survived but the cost has been great, leaving me feeling that I no longer fit into the flow of life
anymore. I am so grateful for so much I had with Mike, and I am so sad at having lost so much when he died…. How do I reconcile those two things and remain stable? It doesn’t seem possible to me. I oscillate between those two extremes…. Hence my emotional instability.
Thanks for just being there for me….
Sienna”
I’m not sure what I’m asking you for…….. Your thoughts……. Do you
have a book on meaning reconstruction that I can purchase that might give me some more tools to share with my friend? As you can see from her text she is in a world of pain and disconnectedness and she says she doesn’t want to be but can’t escape it. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
With Warm Regards and Deep Respect,
Rebecca
