Just Got Diagnosed

August 2022

 

Welcome!


I often talk with my clients about how they envy other people, what they have, how they look, how they feel. And downgrading themselves in the process.  I call this the envy trap.  My lead article address the envy trap, and how to avoid it.  



Recent Events


I am soon heading off to Pennsylvania for a weekend with families living with bleeding disorders, sponsored by my good friends at Comprehensive Health Education Services.  I will be serving as a mental health resource.


I recently spoke in the Philadelphia area at a meeting of the Eastern Pennsylvania Hemophilia Foundation.  My topic was Unconscious Bias in Healthcare.


I also have some great news.  I am working on a book that will published during the spring of 2024.  The title of my book is "The Power of Closure: Why We Want It, How to Get It, and When To Walk Away."  My book will be published by Tarcher Perigee, which is part of Penguin Random House.  Yes, I am hard at work!


My website, JustGotDiagnosed.com is filled with advice, inspiration, and information. 

I can help you with...


My counseling and education program for newly-diagnosed as well as experienced patients, Prepared for the Road Ahead ®, is organized around emotions,  Chronic Communication (sm) (relationships), embracing change, communicating with healthcare professionals, staying informed, making treatment decisions, self-image, and planning for the future.  


Click here to learn more about me


I continue my association with HIV Plus Magazine, hivplusmag.com and Coping with Cancer. I am also writing for a website for individuals living with chronic pain, mayv.co.



 

The Envy Trap. How to Get Out of It, How to Avoid It.  

The grass is always greener on the other side, right? 

 

Well at least that’s what they say, whoever “they” are. And of course, the meaning behind this old saying is that once you get over to the supposedly greener side, assuming you do, you will find things aren’t any better over there. 

 

But when it’s you who’s looking over the other side of the fence, and the people on that side seem to be having a whole lot more fun, it’s hard to wonder about that greener grass.

 

And maybe to feel a little envious of the people who are enjoying it. 

 

I often talk to my clients about how they feel when they see how other people seem to be living. They tell me stories about sitting down to a meal, and having to adhere to a special diet whole everybody else orders whatever they want from the menu. Or being in a group where everybody is running around while they can hardly walk due to fatigue or pain. Even being in a group where everyone else is happy can be hard if you are feeling stuck in sadness or anxiety.      

 

Sure, my clients tell me they accept where they are in life. They have learned to live with their chronic condition. Including the ways in which their condition makes them feel different from other people. That doesn’t mean it’s easy.  


Here's more about envy!

 
 
You are not alone. Let me help you get prepared for the road ahead!
 
Pay Attention!

It's August and it's hot!


But still, I can't help but feel a little sad that the summer is coming to an end. I love the summer! It's quieter here in NYC. The warm weather puts everybody in a better mood. And as long as you avoid the touristy, it's also a lot less crowded.  


We make jokes about hibernating in the winter, but I think humans kind of hibernate in the summer. We slow down, take time to enjoy life. Work projects are often postponed while team members take vacation time. Kids hang out and play rather than rushing to school and extracurricular activities and homework. Of course, summer travel can get hectic. I personally try to avoid summer travel, for that reason.  


As I contemplate the end of summer, I am also reminded of the cycles of life. The change of seasons are one of many. While I don't love winter, I try to find a reason to look forward to each of the seasons ahead. The change of leaves in the fall and the crisp, cool area. The holidays. Pulling favorite sweaters out of the back of my dresser drawers. And of course spring!  


I encourage my clients to always have something to look forward to. This week, this month, this year... and whatever they appreciate the next time we have a change of season.


Look forward. Focus on what's possible. Be grateful. Stay optimistic!  



Also, my website of the month:


Welcome to Verywell Mind, an award-winning resource for reliable, compassionate, and up-to-date information on the mental health topics that matter most to you. We are dedicated to empowering you with the trustworthy evidence-based information you need for your mental and emotional well-being. Our mission is to help you prioritize your mental health and find balance amid the chaos of daily life.


Check out Verywell Mind


 
 
Gary R. McClain, PhD JustGotDiagnosed.com
 
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