To Our Amazing Dads

What do these men

have in common?

Abraham Lincoln, President Joe Biden, Bill Cosby, Mark Twain, Eric Clapton, Leland Stanford, Steve Lawrence, George Washington, former Los Angeles Mayor Richard Riordan, Dick Ebersol, Robert Frost, Senator John Edwards, Carroll O’Connor, and Johnny Carson?

Did you get it right? Yes, all of these men are famous in one way or another and all of these men are fathers. But did you also know that all of these fathers lost one or more children? Of course, we all know that it does not matter whether or not you are famous when your child dies. Losing a child evens the playing field, creating a unity with all grieving fathers.

I once saw President Biden, as he moved along shaking hands, suddenly stop at one specific man. He then gave the man a hug (to the chagrin of his body guards) and shared something with him. Later we found out that the man told President Biden he had also lost a child and thanked the President for his openness about his own losses, for it had helped this man as well. Biden later said he had to stop, for the news the man had shared demanded the connection between two grieving fathers.

Also, one of these fathers is a renowned, respected, and prolific writer, and most of us have read at least one of his books, Tom Sawyer or Huckleberry Finn. His name was Samuel Clemens, known as Mark Twain, and his writings were full of whimsy, humor, and adventure.

Shortly after Suzy's death, Mark Twain was on the lecture circuit when he was asked by a reporter, "Can you please tell us how you are doing?" In response Twain said, "To do so would bankrupt the vocabulary of all the languages.” And in his autobiography, he wrote this about Suzy’s death:

It is one of the mysteries of our nature that a man, all unprepared, can receive a thunder-stroke like that and live. There is but one reasonable explanation of it. The intellect is stunned by the shock and but gropingly gathers the meaning of the words. The power to realize their full import is mercifully lacking.

On the other hand, children of all ages do find ways to gather up words that truly express how they feel about their fathers on Father’s Day. And so we share with you the special phrases of love written by children young and old about their dads.

Know that your children, gone too soon, love you and, if here, would most likely be saying these same things in his or her own way.

So, dads, we honor you, the fathers whose children are not here, and shower you with proclamations of love you so deserve. We hope the memories you hold near and dear will see you through this Father’s Day.

“I want to be just like my dad.”

“It doesn’t matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was, and I remember love."

“My father gave me the greatest gift anyone ever gave to me: he believed in me.”

“We run to my dad when we are scared."

“I just owe almost everything to my dad.”

“To hear the name ‘father’ was, to me, another name for love.”

“My mother made me dinner every night, but my father let me have ice cream for breakfast.”

"He was a good example of how to be a good person, even showing me how to handle mistakes that he made."

“He didn’t tell me how to live; he lived and let me watch him do it.”

"My dad listens to how I feel and what I have to say. That's very important to me."

“My family would not have been the loving foundation it was without my father’s love.”

“I remember my father reading to me at night and how his voice would change as he played the different characters, trying to sound like each one. He always made me laugh.”

“He is my rock and my example always of the tenderness that such strength can hold.”

"Dad helps me with homework because Mom doesn't know how to do it."

"My daddy puts me on his shoulders and lets me grab things high above."

“My father made being a father look like it was the most rewarding experience because he seemed to enjoy every minute of it.”

"My daddy makes me laugh and he's silly."

“I wish I had one more minute to tell my father how much he means to me, how much he gave to me, and to remind him that the person I became was because of him.”

“No one is smarter than my dad.”

“My father always said he was sorry whenever he made a mistake, and I respect him for that.”

It’s very hard for my loving dad

To know that I’m okay.

To protect me was his job, he feels,

So he thinks he failed some way.

Although I had to leave this world,

While still considered young,

There is no way he ever failed –

There’s no more he could have done.

My dad he tends to question

Those things he cannot see.

I always send him little signs

To say, “Hey, Dad, it’s me!”

I hear him crying in the car,

The shower hides his tears.

He feels he has to be so strong

For those he holds so dear.

My dad he often gets so mad

At what became of me.

He wants so much to understand,

He says, “How could this be?”

I somehow need to let him know,

Though impossible it seems –

For him to live and laugh again

Will fulfill so many dreams.

The card I need to send right now

To a dad as great as mine,

Will thank him for the love he gave

Throughout my brief lifetime.

He’s still the one that I call Dad,

Our bond’s forever strong,

‘Cuz even though he can’t see me,

Our love lives on and on.

Please help me find a way

To tell my dad that when

It comes his time to leave the earth

I’ll be waiting there for him.

And also, Mr. Hallmark man,

Please help him to believe,

That nothing will ever change the fact

That my dad he’ll always be.

Watch Documentary Film

Portraits of Hope:

The Parent's Journey. Meet Naomi Watts, Marc Klaas, former L.A. Mayor Richard Riordan, Jack Canfield  Watch here

________________

Who are we?

Watch "This Is griefHaven"