I've been feeling like a little kid a lot lately.

Many things are overwhelming me.

Paying bills, technology, making phone calls, tracking appointments, dealing with insurance, the endless follow through on every single thing that is much more complicated than ever before. It is truly mind-boggling how much we are expected to juggle these days. And I am just me - no kids, no pets, no partner.

I am feeling incredibly vulnerable and am left wondering how in the world I have made it this far in life. I'm almost 60 years old!

Last month I wrote about growing up in a generation where painful experiences were rarely discussed or addressed. The impact of our unresolved trauma has brought more pain and suffering, as evidenced in the world around us.

In the 1990's Los Angeles was a hot bed of self-discovery workshops and classes, and I dove in heart first! I was obsessed, signing up for everything. I understood the language of growth and healing, and my tribe was there.

I am still immersed in what I now call Spiritual Psychology, a phrase coined by the University of Santa Monica. I am grateful for the many gifts I have received on this path and the depth and breadth of relationships because of it.

The 'work' has helped my heart, mind, soul and world expand.

I am unraveling another layer of the onion.

More big feelings are surfacing to heal.

I blame it on quitting smoking.


Smoking suppressed my grief and fear. 
It reinforced my need to figure everything out on my own,

and my attempts to continually manage and control things.
Without that comforting crutch and protective bubble...

I am sometimes left feeling dysregulated and lost.

It's not that I feel like an imposter.

I feel very true to my Heart and Soul.

This has been my guiding Light and I am grateful.

But I have missed the boat on certain aspects of adulting.

In some situations, I am ultra responsible and highly structured.

I excel at organizing and creating systems that are practical, fluid and fun.

But there is so much information now I can't keep up with my own personal organization. My desktop and digital documents are a mess. I stopped getting my email inbox to zero a while ago. I have 62+ active alarms on my phone reminding me to do stuff. The massive amount of ideas, articles, quotes, podcasts, audiobooks, photos, videos, etc. is so overwhelming...

I want to crawl under the covers and never come out. 

Digital and information overload is common.

I see it often with clients and can easily help them.

It's just so much harder when it's my stuff.

There are also basic things I don't know how to do... like mop a floor, or cook meat, or change an LED bulb, or put on make up, or understand taxes and insurance, or invest in a ROTH or a SEP IRA. So many things.

Being a soulo-preneur adds an intense level of pressure to this.

There are many things to think about and do when you are running your own business. Like many people, I avoid doing things I don't feel confident in... so marketing, budgeting and SEO optimization get zero attention.

All of this is bringing up a deep sadness... and compassion.

It seems that many of us are a walking, talking trauma response.

It is a miracle any of us are getting by with real life prices in the USA skyrocketing, massive jobs being lost to AI, and people not wanting to spend money because of the tanking economy. This is deeply impacting my business... which makes this vulnerability even more present and potent.

I so badly want to smoke a cigarette every single day... but I don't.

A great deal is being stripped away in the collective right now. Systems and structures are breaking down. This appears to be happening for some of us on a personal level too. What is no longer working must collapse, and it is painful.

If you are growing through something similar, know that I am right here with you. It is okay to fumble and find our way step by baby step. Let's do our best to keep our heart open, support each other, and continue moving forward.

I may not be great at adulting, but I wholeheartedly

believe in and honor the preciousness of you!

Gentle Blessings,

Teri Jo

Adulthood is like the vet, and we're all the dogs that were excited

for the car ride until we realized where we were going.

~Anonymous

All our lives, we want to grow up—to be treated like adults, to have freedom to choose. Then we get here and it turns out being an adult sucks. We pay the bills and taxes, watching others succeed while we are forever waiting for our turn. We believe we are special, but nothing special has come our way.

~Marcella Purnama

TED Talk: Trauma, Shame and Being Enough (16 minutes)

The effects of trauma are stored in the body. 

Until they are addressed there, words alone are not enough.

~Bessel van der Kolk, MD

Trauma compromises our ability to engage with others by

replacing patterns of connection with patterns of protection.

~Stephen Porges

YOUTUBE: It's Not About the Nail (2 minutes)

This grown-up thing isn’t for sissies.

~Sarah Addison Allen

I am convinced that most people do not grow up. We marry and dare to have children and call that growing up. I think what we do is mostly grow old.

We carry accumulation of years in our bodies, and on our faces, but generally our real selves, the children inside, are innocent and shy as magnolias.

~Maya Angelou

Check out my new personalized SOUL SHINE Coaching program! Work with me Soulo over 6 months to create your best life.

Click on the image to find out the details

Book your free Discovery Call here

One of the strange things about adulthood is that you are your current self,

but you are also all the selves you used to be, the ones you grew out of

but can't ever quite get rid of.

~John Green

TED TALK: Lies Adults Tell Young People (9 minutes)

“Don't you find it odd," she continued, "that when you're a kid, everyone,

all the world, encourages you to follow your dreams. But when you're older, somehow they act offended if you even try.”

~Ethan Hawke

The ORGANIZED Corner

LOL, I am the one who organizes the racks at the checkout stand,

and tidies up magazines at the magazine counter.

If you need Decluttering and Organizating support, let's talk.

Email here to book your free Virtual Consultation.

O, to be sure, we laugh less and play less and wear uncomfortable disguises like adults, but beneath the costume is the child we always are, whose needs are simple, whose daily life is still best described by fairy tales.

~Leo Rosten

Got clutter? Paper piles? An overflowing inbox? Not enough time?

Call me at 310-907-6846 to book your free consultation

terijowheeler.com

The most annoying thing about being a grown-up is that 

nobody ever says, 'No, you don't have to go to work today.’

~Unknown

Movie Rec: The Wisdom of Trauma

But maybe that’s all adults really were, just big kids 

with more responsibility and a lot of practice covering it up.

~Andrew Van Wey

Need Home, Project, Paper or Digital Organizing?

Book your free Consultation today

I never thought I’d need to teach myself how to nap, 

but here I am, an adult who finally figured it out.

~Ken Breniman

Song 4 You: We Are Young by PS22 Chorus & Walk the Moon

You have to keep breaking your heart until it opens.

~Rumi